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Temptress of Mine

Missing image





You creep

inside my thoughts
and you sleep

throughout my pain.
You're the swiftest little rhea
that ever drifted through the rain.

You sing

with a purr
and you sting

with a grrr.
Your words were all lies

that were gone in a blur.


I followed along

'Cause I thought I could win.

I gave you my pawn

but you traded me in.

Now life's a game that lovers lose

and hallways, coffins wreathed in sin.


Your song

was such a lovely purr

You've stifled

what we almost were

Your smoldering liquid with my powdered dreams...
and all you did was sift and stir.
And sift
and stir
and sift
and stir.



Author notes

revised version
Written December 29th, 2003

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Comments

1 - 9 of 9

  • BleAcHeDandDyEd
    January 23, 2006
    Edit | Reply
    I love this peice. I escpecially like the ending
    Your smoldering liquid,
    With my powdered dreams,
    And all you did
    Was sift and stir.


    And sift
    And stir.
    And sift
    And stir.

    Amazing works I have seen from you. This is great. never give it up.
    -Erica


  • A RavensBrutalSong
    November 15, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Very cool, I like it!


  • PsydewaysTears gold member
    September 10, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Yeah this poem is from forever ago. I was attempting a different format and didn't like how it shaped up after the first 6 stanzas so I sort of just dropped it like it was hot. Anywho.... thanks for the crangratulations!

  • ocerus
    September 10, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    I'm afraid this one doesn't really work for me. I mean no offense, it's just that it's so short that it isn't descriptive or emotive enough for me to get what you're driving at. But kudos on the book deal! I can't say that there are many people who have me on their favorites list who are FUCKING PUBLISHED AUTHORS!!! (I am on your favorites, right? That's what my computer insists on telling me. Hope it's not wrong. Anyway, thanks for the support, and congrats again!
    Edited on Sep 10, 5:41 p.m. because ''.


  • illusi0ns
    February 19, 2005
    Edit | Reply
    Your smoldering liquid,
    With my powdered dreams,
    And all you did
    Was sift and stir.

    my god, its GORGEOUS
    and your choosing of picture to go allong with it is great
    bravo
    -sancia-
    VvvvvV

  • lady azure
    December 23, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    i don't know why you hate it, this is beautiful! maybe it's just the way i can relate fully towards this poem, but i adore it. awesome, awesome job.


  • Paint Me Beautiful
    April 29, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    ' You sing
    Sweet innocence,
    Yet you bring
    Guilty pleasure

    I'm the pawn
    Of your game,
    I was like the dawn,
    Silent and pure'

    I love this..thanx for sharing


  • junkriot
    February 11, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    i dont really like the rhyme scheme of this piece either...not to say that its not good...because it is...and im the type of girl to tell you the truth...so if it sucked really bad id say so...anyway...i like the repetition at the end...and...um...yea i guess thats all...for now...

    "Am I Your Anything?"
    TiSTiC

  • Antigone
    December 29, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    "Your smoldering liquid,
    With my powdered dreams"
    these lines are in ferfect combination, feeding of the other. haunted, in a sense, which has its own charm. fine job.

1 - 9 of 9