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My Violin

The bow in perfect position
my nose full of the smell of wood and resin
my hands are feeling the slight tension
as I wait for the count to be given

The bow gently caresses the thin strings
as the music flows from the deepest places,
the notes take expertly to their wings
and the music gives way to the tune that it chases

the teasing notes fall and rise
as the harmonious sound rings in my ears 
I am slave to the music, in me it always abides
and it forever washes away the haunting fears

the song is wavering as the last note sounds
but the gentle music plays forevermore within
my love for thee never fails to astound
my beautiful, underestimated violin.

Author notes

Option four:
Tell me about playing music. What it feels like what the piece is composed of? What is the beat and timing? Are you playing it by yourself? Are you in an orchestra? A rock band? Describe your surroundings and what you are playing. Why are you playing it? are you practicing? Or simply having fun? Tell me

I just turned 13
Five beautiful words: magnificent, lavish, exquisite, engulfing and heart melting.
'I did not read the rules'.
My favourite colour is red but sometimes really light pink or really light blue, lol.

I love playing the violin, most magical thing in the world; it even clashes with my books!

A contest entry

what do you think?

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 19 of 19

  • shtrdglassheart
    December 26, 2008

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    Wow.. just wow.. for someone your age this piece is marvelous. Congratulations dear. I see this piece has won you many trophies. Good job. I too myself, loved this one. It describes for sure what a lovely thing it is to play the violin. How tedious and wonderful it is. I too play the violin as well as the viola and they are two of my favorite instruments.

    Unfortunatley... for this piece I do not have a favorite stanza I love it all. The begining and end are powerful and the middle gives it structure as well it is very well described.

    I thank you very much for entering my contest.
    Good luck
    <3 Shtrdglassheart
    Mandi


  • your angers a gift
    September 30, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    great write...thanks for entering


  • grannyeri gold member
    August 2, 2008

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    Wow, you sure have written a lovely poem here, and congratulations on the silver and HM awards you have won so far. THe violin is not an easy instrument to play, yet it sounds so beautiful when played by someone who knows how to make it sound that way. Liked the feelings you express so well in these lines. Keep writing.


  • satan-
    July 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow, this poem is fantastic! Your vocab choice is fab for your age, and the way you strung them through your poem is so smoothly done. The intensity of your love for music is very noticeable throughout your poem, and I just love the feeling of getting lost in harmonious notes, so I can easily relate. Wonderful poem, thanks for entering!


  • Rovingone gold member
    July 7, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    You have such great descriptive ability. Your poem is beautifully detailed, giving the reader an intense insdie view of the musician at work.

  • PianoMan
    July 7, 2008

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    Nice poem. It reminds me of my best friend who plays the violin very well. Unfortunately he doesn't really like playing it. lol.


  • Sketchin
    July 6, 2008

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    nice...very good word use...i could just picture this as i read...thank u for entering and good luck.


  • stylization
    July 5, 2008

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    You just turned 13? Wow. This is gorgeous for one so young, although I shouldn't be talking. I love the emotion and imagery portrayed here. I myself am a pianist and experience much of the same connection, and I have seen violinists play who don't so much play their violin as converse and dance with it. Gorgeous poem, you deserved the trophies. I just suggest deleting some of the ended contests to clean up the page. But gorgoues imaery.


  • Florida Sunshine
    June 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    I've been to many concerts and have seen many violin players. The way you've describe it here is just what I see. There is such power in the violin -- playing the songs good, bad and indifferent.

    Though you didn't use punctuation marks in your poem, you did use some grammar, which left me wondering is the 2nd to last stanza all one sentence? You capitalized your 'T' in the first two stanza's but not in the last two, so my assumption is the 2nd to last stanza is all one sentence.

    However, I do look at grammar in regards to having a better understanding of the message you're trying to state, but it isn't a deciding factor in the value of your write. There are quite a few poets who uses unique punctuation in their poetry as a point.

    You did a great job and I enjoyed reading your poem. I especially believe you have a terrific skill in rhyming. You've rhymed your words 'elegantly,' as elegant as the violin.

    Thanks for entering the 'Passions' contest, it was my pleasure to read your work. The best of luck to you.

    Florida Sunshine


  • Angelo di Luce gold member
    June 27, 2008
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    A beautiful write
    well done
    Blessings


  • SoftlyScreaming
    June 24, 2008

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    its so detailed and gives itself meaning.. you have a beautiful way with words, and i could see it all so clearly.. music touches me the most because i worship my guitar.. i liked this poem because it hits somewhere home. thank you for entering and good luck.


  • sykotic
    June 24, 2008

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    WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    your writing is amazing for a 13 year old but unfortunately i asked for sonnets in the contest angel... keep up the great work, hope to see more of you


  • enitsirhC
    June 22, 2008

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    Wow!
    This is really good!
    I really like the rhythm and diction!

    Good luck in my contest dear

  • piccola silver member
    June 20, 2008

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    Very well done and I like it tremendously but if you notice below rule # 5 it says no previous trophy winners and this has a silver already so I must DQ


  • BlackSwan
    June 19, 2008

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    This poem was ingenious! well done, I love poems about violins. If you like... Check out my poem Wooden Glass

    Well done! Nice rhyme scheme also
    -GL in contest

  • poetrytoopeneyes
    June 16, 2008

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    Brilliant description! I used to play the viola... this makes me really regret giving it up.

    I think this was an excellent poem with all of the imagery, I can see why you won silver.

    It contained more than just imagery for seeing, it had smell:

    the smell of wood and rosin

    sound:

    harmonious sound rings in my ears

    touch:

    my hands are feeling the slight tension

    I'm also very relieved you didn't include taste

    But yes, great write.


  • wonderbandalice
    June 14, 2008
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    Lovely!
    The rhyme is very...loose, to me, but it works very well! I loved it!


  • Nephlim
    June 10, 2008

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    Thank you for following the most of the rules!

    First off, I really loved how fluid everything sounded here, even the rhyming I knew was there, but I barely really noticed it, it melted into the poem so well. I love the words you had in the wordbank . The only complaint I have is that you put 'I did not read the rules' in your author's notes, I mean, how rude . Good luck!


  • Frodofan silver member
    June 10, 2008

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    This really did seem to be written with ease. Smooth and effortless. I can tell you truly love your instrument!

    I did think this one part seemed a little forced however, "in me it always abides."

    Otherwise, very nice. I liked the way you described even the smell of the resin. Made it very real.

    The sound of the violin has always entranced me!

    Thank you for entering.

1 - 19 of 19