I don't want to believe that the demons have surfaced
I'd like to think that my existence bears purpose
Failed redemption strangles my conscience
Do-good-ers are poison, true love is just nonsense
A contest entry
- Capturing Emptiness by Jonathing66.
600 points, ended June 9, 2008, 9 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Good
Thank you for entering the competition.
This almost got a medal but was just a little too busy to convey the tranquilised state on an emotional level
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Welcome to All Poetry
Just a quick pointed, try to add punctuation such as comma's to the poem as this can add a more distinct flow and sepearte the lines out, but also try not to use a capital letter at the end of the sentence as well.
this is a wonderful write that is dark with that beautiful and yet sad feeling of being empty that a lot of has have experienced and will understand. you have not made the poem too long and this is a good thing as it dosnt drift away from what your poem is resembling and will therefore keep the reader intrested as tehey read it. well done and best of luck
Charlotte
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