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" Untitled "

A part of me is crying out for something meaningful
The life I have lead has not satisfy me
You are the only person who has ever touched me
You are the best chance of saving my humanity
I will live for you
and because of you i have come to terms
with my life's purpose
I have only realized inner peace
by bringing life to our land
and sharing this harvest with you
You showed me how to live as a man
You encouraged a calm in my inner self
I did not fully apreciate the value of other people
until you thought me to see the value of my own life
you saved me!
you were the first person to want me
not for what i can do for them
but for what i really was for a human being
and for that i will always adore you my love, i swear!

Now that I have lost you
I will honor your memory
for now i carry that duty with me
as I carried your body back to our home
now that my heart feels this pain
I know the nightmare i made you endure with my cruel actions
You suffered a pain like this when i used to kill
Now it's all over my love for their is rest in death
but my agony has just begun as i seek a way to atone for my wrongs
I have to live because you died for me
I will live honorably for you


Author notes

I have yet to title this piece, if i may explain my write, this is about an assassin who tries to live a normal life with a woman,
i hope you like it ^^,

A contest entry

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Comments


  • Connor Blackbird
    June 17, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Lots and lots of telling, very little showing. Actions speak louder than words - could this have been told by example, or in a story? If not then this is basically just a somewhat repetitive monologue, and "I love you" loses its impact after a few repetitions unless there's something more to it.


  • BlackSwan
    June 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Very interesting and original story!

    "Now that I have lost you
    I will honor your memory" -I love the emotion and dedication within the write.

    good job!
    -GL in contest


  • Beauty Of Silence
    June 8, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    wow! this was grand! It was really well written and held powerful emotions! emotions that cut deep into my heart! >.< i love the way you phrased this poem... it was kinda diff from your other pieces! unique! This is not like any other love poem dude... it just posed as a very diff one to me (i have no idea y... but thats a good thang) Maybe because of the "story" behind this... ohh well, this was yet another awesome piece! keep writing kays... and good luck for the contest!

    ~Ranji