i am a splintered grain
scorched to the core
borne from the seed of adam
there is a divison of veins
one cracks like stone
another
shrouds me in somber
i am distracted by drumming
heartbeats at their threshold
playing the dark music below
stitched together forever
in his needle's eye
sacred was the crown of thorns
but now only darkness
fills my curved membrane
splitting me in two
one embracing mercy
the other
merely
fuel for the fire
Author notes
Hell is just the next entertainment
a line from the poetry of Lute
In a list
A contest entry
- One Hour-Prompt-Close when I see the winners!!! by Cannonsfire.
1750 points, ended June 8, 2008, 9 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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jaded teardrop
this is a really amazing poem. It has so much great imagery. I felt as if I was really in the moment with the peom. The poem's plot was very vivid, just the way I like it. this defenitly deserved the gold... great job...

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I need to peek in on you more than I do, I don't know why I don't? Sigh...this is why I always leave with a sense of odd balance when I read you Richard. Well done.


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I can easily see how this took the Gold. That's a heck of a prompt and you ran with it well. It sort of reminds me of our higher self badering with our earth bound spirit. Neither really "wins" we just dance and move waiting to see which one will have the strength and passion to surpress the other, when reality we should just let them embrace and roll with the feelings
Awesome piece Muddy


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Oh my, the ying and yang in the war to rule one way and beguile by another.... truly a great, thought-proovking poem, my friend.


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Very vividly done. I think you touch on points that most of us can relate to from some sort of frame of reference. Realizing that you wrote it for a specific contest, I still think it has a broad audience appeal outside the realm of the contest. It sort of expresses the split that we all feel from time to time.
I love the starkness of the ending.
It is good to be back and reading your stuff again
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Worth the Gold
Awesome writing !!

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taiinfinite
congrats on gold awesome take on prompt

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Brilliant! Can see it and feel it all. Love your take on the prompt. Love, C


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I do think that Cannonsfire is going to really like this piece. I have decided not to enter now. Juls


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Liked the way you brought the title to the ending - bringing everything in between together. Liked the flow and the creative use of space as well.


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I feel a stoic angst flowing through this poem. It leaves me hot.


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