Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Secured By Memory

She sat there
crouched in a corner,
sweltering tears bursting forth.

It could not have happened.
He cannot be gone.
She could still see him.

Enveloped by moments gone,
she sat and watched him,
as his smile replayed in her head
endlessly.

Author notes

4. Tents of memory

A contest entry

Critique and give suggestions, please.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments


  • penman gold member
    June 8, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Wonderful

    Very well done. Best of luck in the contest.

  • abyssal
    June 7, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Love those last two lines the most. They are so alive, yet fading.