In the dead of evening,
That doom-filled night,
I felt you walking behind me,
I turned searching, but by then you were gone,
Silently laughing at my panic,
My paranoia, as you knew I was helpless,
Only it wasn’t paranoia you were
there, waiting for your chance,
I felt you walking behind me again
only this time,
You didn’t disappear,
Your hand clamped over my mouth,
Silencing my screams before they
even caught the air, choking me.
Your iron arms forced me down
into the dust, my face to one side,
Your dirty voice in my ear;
‘You’ll enjoy it,’
I shut my eyes tight and tried
desperately, not to move,
I was so frightened when I saw
the glimmer of metal in my eyes,
Your controlling element in hand,
The tears never fell, not even
as you tore off my blouse,
Your evil, perverted hands on my chest,
Not even when you broke my zipper in
your twisted desperation,
I was so sickened, and I feared for my life,
Then you started raping me,
Stealing my virginity,
Tearing at my insides,
Oh God, the pain of it!
Before you finished,
Knife at my throat,
You fled then, you fucking coward,
Afraid of being caught,
I ran straight home, my skin
crawling still with your ugly self,
I didn’t report you, lucky I should have,
You stole my innocence in seven minutes,
I lay in bed silently sobbing,
My throat raw from vomiting,
And I still feel it now, hear it, see it,
Nightmares still hold me,
Does that make you proud?
Now I’m sure you’re waiting,
for another innocent to break,
I was never enough you had to have more,
My life ended the day you decided,
that I was to be your victim,
For that is how I have always been;
The victim of life and society,
My life ended the day you decided,
That I was nothing but a doll,
Author notes
This is a true story no lies, and it was the end of my life...
A contest entry
- Life changing (Big points!!) by A m b r e a.
850 points, ended October 19, 2008, 9 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think of the poem? Be honest, but not too harsh :)
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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i was touched by your pain you were just a kid and he robbed you of your chidhood its so hard for you to see but you are stronger than you think you are a victim if you let him win your a surviour in my eyes and very brave to let it all out dont let him h
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Thanks for your kind words I was 18 but still so young and innocent, thanks again for commenting,
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It was so brave of you to share this tradgic event. I recently got up the courage to share my story, which is much like this. You can never truly understand the ways that this horrible happening can change your life unless you are a victim. I had never felt so out of control in my whole life, and it changed me forever. Well done, putting across the emotion, the anger, the pain and fear. I applaud you on your courage, and I hope that we may both see past the pain one day. Thank you so much for entering, and good luck in my contest!
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Thanks for your comments it's nice to know some people still care for others
thanks again x
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aww babe this is a heartbreaking poem,
its so painful and i just hope you can look up now,
keep wrriting its really good,
love ya,kitty xxxx
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