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Pukatawagan Purification

The stem furls back into the body,
chews on the root, deep in the Earth.
Pulsing vivacious Earth
let me lay my head on your chest
let me smell your musty, morning dew
find your rhythm in my soul,
my Negesh, my Dan-Tien,
let me cup your hope in the hollow
of my hand,
drink it, and be refreshed,
let the sun paint pictures
inside my eyelids
when I blink.
Let me find your rhythm
in a streetlight, a thunderstorm,
a moment, a metaphor.
A stone to the palm, solid,
silk to the touch, rain on the eyelids
behind the eyelids lies
static electric vision in
technicolor sun love-lives,
a picture
arms open,
palms upward.

Author notes

Option 3, a portrait of Love.
My inspiration was an extremely spiritual week working with the company I dance with and the youth in a reserve in northern Manitoba. I love each and every one of the beautiful people that I got to work with.

A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 13 of 13

  • new born
    October 4, 2008

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    This was truly beautiful. I loved the sense of being able to find beauty and feel the earth through even the most insignificant things. Very good!

  • turtletacular
    October 4, 2008
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    a comment

    lol tweakermuffin mmm... muffins. very discriptive. great poem. tweakermuffin....

  • Violet Moodswing gold member
    June 22, 2008

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    Absolutely beautiful in the minds eye as well as the heart space. Thanks for your entry, I enjoyed reading it.


  • storiesuntold
    June 21, 2008

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    Very good write here

    You have penned a poem with such depth and feeling . Its visions brought the reader to another time and demension . Keep up the good work and good luck in the contest


  • seeyouinsleep
    June 19, 2008

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    Ooh, how pretty! I absolutely love this. Such vivid descriptions backed up by deliciously woven metaphors. Excellent! My only problem: "let the sun paint pictures" sounds like such a dull line, and I don't really think it fits very well with the rest of the poem. Perhaps you could find a way to rewrite it? Good job on everything else, though.

  • ratkos
    June 18, 2008
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    so vivid! i like it

  • indomitable
    June 18, 2008

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    this is quite lovely, would that everyone could see the magic abundant in our daily lives. i cant say i get all the metaphors, perhaps after another cup of coffee, lol. still, this is beautiful. paints a breathless picture, and reminds me of those rare moments i get, the sort of inbetween moments where everything is clear for an instant and the world is filled with magic and promise. where you can for a split second FEEL god, without needing a label or name for him/her/it.


  • perfectsunset gold member
    June 17, 2008

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    Oh what a beautifully metaphorical and imagery filled piece you have penned here. brilliant thoughts!

    Thanks for entering & best of luck

  • Midnight-x-Rose gold member
    June 16, 2008
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    I love the metaphor within this, really interesting and different.
    Also beautiful imagery

  • Shades of Pale silver member
    June 16, 2008
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    sorry.

    sorry... BUT THIS IS GREAT! I LOVE IT YOU MIGHT WIN IF THERE NO ONE BETTER

  • pine-needles
    June 13, 2008

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    wow. gorgeous, a refreshing swallow of peace and joy. (i feel a little weird commenting on it.)

    i don't know about the part from "behind the eyelids lie..." on, except for the last two lines, kind of a shift in tone, not quite consistent, at least for me. i love everything that comes before though, especially

    "let the sun paint pictures
    inside my eyelids
    when I blink."
    what a wonderful way to describe this, never saw the beauty in it before,

    and "Let me find your rhythm
    in a streetlight, a thunderstorm,
    a moment, a metaphor."

    anyway, excellent!

  • Sharon Lynn
    June 9, 2008

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    Awesome

    I'm almost speechless. You did such a touching write and you touched my heart. I share your idea and love the imagery you used.

    . Rewarded 4


  • Luna Tique Fringe gold member
    June 6, 2008

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    Absolutely gorgeous, alive with imagery...

    "let me cup your hope in the hollow
    of my hand,"

    Stunning...

1 - 13 of 13