woods framed the riversides
silent waters creep
threads of this water spill
bursting into loud gushes
a blond sun retires
for the day
in the midst of this dam
sits a grand castle
oddly magnificent
courting much power
every room stays lit
the castle sits there because of a
frightening spell, a curse,
inside is utter lonliness
for the sole inhabitant
voices tease
hysteria drives him
to pluck out his eyeballs
madness becomes his mother
Author notes
Photo by: fstarno: "Waterfall Castle."
A contest entry
- Ghost/Horror Story, NO RULES, PREWRITES ALLOWED. Have fun!:) Held by a 11 year old! by Daisy Ballerina.
565 points, ended January 8, 2009, 18 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
I'd like some feedback.
Comments
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Creepy LOL but a vivid picture you have painted here. Well done.
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Can imagine this picture from the words you use in your poem- even with no photo there. Very deep and desperate the situation you describe here. Cursed indeed. (check loneliness). Was the second line indented on purpose, or just a typo? Good flow.
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Very Imaginative and a great take on this. Loved the imagery and the theme carried throughout. well done and best of luck!
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