Limited by our own knowledge, severed roots of bitter contempt
entertain the lies, transgression speaks to the wicked and bent
overlooked radiance, piercingly pure. the pervasive grace
by design, the journey's revealed, destinations await.
Unconscious ignorance and emotional deception.
broken promises are merely perception
indelible strength, an intrinsic nature
when hope lives there's something to treasure
The formless face of creation, clarity of sight.
a foundation of formulation is the light
crystalline intention, the wellspring of truth
this Purity defiled, severed at the roots
Severed roots of bitter contempt
transgression speaks to the wicked and bent
Unconscious ignorance and emotional deception.
broken promises are merely perception
Author notes
FAITHLESS
In a list
A contest entry
- Prewrites by Dragonbabyx3.
800 points, ended July 6, 73 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - religion vs not by isaacokumu.
470 points, ended July 11, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 35 of 35
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A thought provoking write.
I enjoyed reading this...seems it will have a timeless quality and appeal.
With the meaning changing as peoples perceptions change.
Excellent Work
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well written and a good read poem, i like it, good luck in the contest
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Beautiful work, I love the imagery, the the picture/movie is beautiful, life, at a standstill, yet busy all around. The last line is so credible, "Broken promises are merely perception" Everything is perception. What one percieves, is not exactly how another percieves. One of lifes little wacky things
You did an excellent job on this piece! Good Luck and Thankyou for entering my contest!
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Beautifully written.
Congrats on the well deserved spotlight!
Lynda
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amazingly brilliant
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The way these words flow is impressive. Isn't that what makes a poem?
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as i read your work and pondered, read the comments below , I have discovered that as much
as every one raved about your Work, there will be those, that take offense to writes such as this,
not me of course, but other who cant see the Artistic value of a beautiful Poem such as yours
and will be Rude because of their own Views and opinions, someone that critics a poem should
be able to not personalize their views and see the Value in the words that are written.
and on that note, i do have to say that you wrote a very strong piece of Poetry, well Done! i will be stopping by more,
Blessings
Rend
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thank you Rend
i realy don't mind critics ... it makes for great revisions sometimes .. i guess i'm happy that it stirs it up so to speak ... lol truth is i realy didnt phathom or absorb this till i go it all out of me.. lol..
makes me happy no matter the comment ... lol your's was thought out and concidered .. i apreciate that
and all these others too ... i will get on the ball here some time soon time permiting and catch up on returns
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thank you
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oh shit
god you got 21 bloody comments....mmmm and one that is.mmmmmmmm shall we say out of order.
what can i say..about this poem..well it's superb, profound...it doesn't need revision....you got the gift my mate....am i jealous.... nah....well maybe a little lol, maybe a lot, but we all need the big stars in the sky to see the little ones..i'm quite happy being a little star as long you big ones are there to guide us...keep cool brother and keep writing
and keep shining...thanks
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thanks eric
gotta love comments regardless i just realized that guys comment helps prove my point on "Unconscious ignorance" lol thanks for your read and comment ...
ill catch up .. i know i will
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Hey there, well had to drop by n visit the master did I not.
I just been reading my origonal comment on this, way back one of the first of yours that I read.
Its interesting now to read and comment again, with new perspective.
The poetry is still as profoundly beautiful as ever,
but yet now this appeals on a much deeper level for me.
for me now, the opening line, limited by our own knowledge, just sums it all up, and well, the more of you I read, the less i feel limited
so thankyou
This is a well deserved spotlite, and a privelage to read
I really mean that
T
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it's a really good poem !!!!! how did you come up with such a good one???
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thank you
this one just ralphed up right on the page LOL
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Sorry, keep trying-- don't give up!
This effort, while undoubtedly cathartic in the writing (for the author,) is abstruse to the point of being utter nonsense. It panders to the intellectually delusional; a class of mental illness.
Real writers eat hard criticism for breakfast; without milk. -
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In reply to bobtenger
ya know, the first time I read this, I didn't entirely get the subject matter, got it completely wrong infact. But had to concede that despite MY ignorance the work was profoundly good, well crafted with carefully chosen language that created superb imagery.
Furthermore , that the natural flow reflected the emotion behind the poem.
These are in my opinion, the ingredients of high quality poetry.
Recently with new interest I re read, and was blown away because now I understand it, a little better at least, its a learning curve, encouraged by a love of poetry.
I do not consider myself to be intellectually delusioned, but rather enlightened,
and refreshed.
while I am sure the writer can take criticism, with or without milk,I would point out, that real critics give fair comments that are not hampered by their own personal thought patterns, or inability to grasp the subject matter.
And that they understand that comments like mine are not personal, but prompted by a passion for the craft that brought us all here.
To that end, welcome to ap , i look foreward very much to reading and commenting your work, which I am sure will be of a very high standard
Thanks
moonsail (T) -
ohhh please,,, you know a little about MENTAL ILLNESS do you? ummm,,, good luck with your treatment
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um ... ok?
was that criticism?? lol sounded alot like a reaction to the subject matter... nice to wake and see this in the spotlight and to have a few comments on it all the same tho.. thank you for thr read
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Excellent
Beautifully written and constructed. Made for a great read. All in all niiiiice. -
really good..this is one i'd come back to..Words chosen were so beautiful..I love this.
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you have earned a bookmark
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well alright
.. ever read one of your own writes on the daily?
well this one i do
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lol, so its just me, n my bestist bud peter, who is keepin me compant today
this is definately ure best work, i agree,
i love ur deep stuff, bestist of all
thanks
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unconscious ignorance...
i luv this line because sometimes we are so unaware of our ignoance in life by the way love the moving picture
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great piece thanks a million for sharing
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wonderfully profound...truly enlightening...and enlightened..lol....this is bright...light...proof of your gifting...a brilliant offering, graceful and strong..amazingly rich...love love it
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Touche! and Bravo! Now this is what I've come to expect of you!
Seems you've scaled some mountains in your time
Not religion alone, this country was still born.
Fabulous my friend. Keep it up!
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Great flow.
I love that it's sound is almost an illusion of rhyme. Barely there, yet present to create the needed flow word-to-word.
Cheers!
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I really enjoyed this one, I thought it summed up what a lot of people sometimes feel about their faith, and the way they sometimes cling to it ,maybe out of superstition,maybe it's just me., I particularly liked the second to last verse, last two lines, they kind of gave me an image of a dying bush in the wilderness, sort of like the one that Jonah sat under, until God killed it, really moving good write littlefishone
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nice little picture. It goes well with the poem.
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Totally love the title. Your word choice is magnificent. Promises are not meant to be broken, they are not suppose to be based on lies that a person can never achieve. This is why I don't make a promise I can't keep. I'm kinda inspired by this write though. Amazing. Pure Brilliance.
Ros -
Superb!
You have a great command of words and where they belong.
Excellent!!
wolf
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This is wonderful, the wording you have used here is great and this is such a good take on the prompt, well done and all the best for the contest.
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fantastic! wow...i almost cried.lol felt this in my chest... love the repitition...you use that well in your writes...once again i dig what you do...alot
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aww this is really really good huni,
i love this sweetie, its just so great,
you have such a wondeful way with words,
keep penning, love yew!
xxx kitty
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