Summertime
and the morning is warming
to night's dreams that shall color day's sky;
promises pulsing
but dark shadows are hanging
just above the hot tar rolling slowly by
One heart is happy
but another is hiding
wounded by spring that did not last;
yes, somewhere a lone heart
is cold in its shivering
while sunshine is passing on a soul overcast
Summertime
and the lonely are lonely
but sweet Love has been spreading its wings;
so come on, Baby,
let's join in hearts' singing
come on, Baby, let's see what summer may bring!
Author notes
Inspired: Summertime -- Billie Holiday
Photo and GraphicArt: Personal, 2008
In a list
A contest entry
- Billie Holiday Inspiration by Kari.
600 points, ended June 10, 2008, 7 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 42 of 42
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This flows very well together. Thank you very much for your entry!
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i like the second and fith line seven and eight r realy true too i love this poem it realy flows and i don't read much in this catagory but it is good u make it work so that i can understand it
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Ohhpz.. i saw numbers of comments below your poem,, it was astonishing.. If truly then it was just an OK piece.. i can't give it any number,.. but i wish if you make your work more prolific
and my wishes are with you
by
The poet of hearts and beautiful words
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I feel happy!
Jeez! Way to bring a ray of upbeat sunshine into a semi-overcast day! I just had to smile when I read this. Awesome stuff!
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aww this is awesome!
we all need some cheering up these days, great way to do it!
Maybe you can share some of that sunshine lol
Been rainy all week here!
Great poem!!
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I don't know why I took so long to click on this!
amazing work...excellent rhyme scheme coupled with a complex rhythm..and what a theme..love, dreams, sunny days and fun! Bravo...
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I don't know why I took so long to click on this!
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good stuff
very poetic,I like this poem.it shows a talent for expression without saturating the reader with shallow "poetic special effects" such as over- dramatization and over-intellectualism.touching without being corny.good job this is truely a piece of art. -
really good. I liked it
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a sweet and hopeful song. A fitting tribute to Ms. Holliday. I love the positive and forward looking nature of these words
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Very Good
I was reading through this and I had a few thoughts of my own if you don't mind me being so bold.
First off, did you mean for the flow to feel real unnatural but smooth nonetheless?
My second thought was how I liked your use of the three quatrains to make your point. It wasn't too short to get your message across, but you didn't make it too long and hard to finish reading (as I myself have done before).
Overall it was really good and thanks for sharing!!
-Nexx, The Fallen Poet
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Yay! If there's singing involved I'm in. Fabulous.
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The poem is very pleasing to the eye with presentation, which I think helps when one is looking at a poem for it soothes the mind automatically. A bright beginning, summertime brings light to people’s spirits. There is truth here, yes, as one is happy another is sad, but that is the way of the world, in the next day the roles could well be reversed and the one that is happy is sad and the one that is sad finds happiness. A good ending, let the songs of love devour humanity with its pleasant mouth.
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NAILED IT!
I am in love with your words. I sometimes sing and I just sang this with the mind set of Billie Holiday. Uplifting words of hope. She wanted us all to know that summertime was a s.l.o.w. season, meant for kicking back and chilling. Wonderful job!
Linda
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I love Billie Holiday and you would have made her proud. I love this...summertime doesn't last long, so you really do have to make it the best you can..alone or not..well done, thanks for sharing
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Each summer we wonder what the days of the holidays will bring - the warmth, the sunshine, the opportunity. Like the sentiments you expressed in these lines and the optimism you end with.
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why does this poem remind me so much of me? well, i would have to say this is an awsome poem. Good luck in the contest you entered it in!
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i like the twist in the end, the call for hope of love .. i like the spirit in this piece too .
good job
me..
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Yes, excellent. I loved it. You made a whole new verse for an old classic. You deserve a big smoochy kiss!
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very lyrical
flows wonderfully. -
It reminded me of Summertime as soon as I read the title. Love that song, and your poem is very good too. I like the theme of one reaching out to another lonely soul. I find that relatable. Good luck.
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Nice montage of sights, sounds, scents and other sensory images.
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great pic & sweet message
great pic and sweet authentic message! Ahhh, the sound of summer is great eye,ear, and heart candy. And you work your message well. I especially enjoyed verse 2's "wounded by spring that did not last" though mine was wounded during the fall...LOL! I'm fine now and your ending, "sweet love has been spreading its wings" is the optimism that works so well! Best to you in the contest...but this piece is already a winner!
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A beautiful write based on Summertime & it's melody (I enjoy the song, as well).
"One heart is happy
but another is hiding
wounded by spring that did not last;
yes, somewhere a lone heart
is cold in its shivering
while sunshine is passing on a soul overcast"
~ A verse lined with mixed emotion, happy for one, sad for the other...Well done, altho it's hard to frown & smile at the same time.
I like this, thank you for sharing your take on this.
Tim
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Very good
Well written and brings so much hope.
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Ageless
Actually, my first impression was of Mungo Jerry. But it just didn't seem to fit the further I read... then: Billie. A-ha!
First Impressions: Daughter - boyfriend of dreams-over the moon- breakup/cheating- healing.
rites of passage b lues to the tune of ageless blues.
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You take a sad situation and make it vibrate with the positivity of fresh dreams and hopes for a brighter future.
'let's join in hearts' singing
come on, Baby, let's see what summer may bring!'
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Mmm...I agree a sweet poem. I particularly liked the line "yes, somewhere a lone heart is cold in its shivering
while sunshine is passing on a soul overcast". I thought that was quite powerful.
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I know not of Summer coz I am in Kenya but here sometimes during the dry season the sun can be so hot to cinder even the toughest of stems. May be due to this and relating it to Summertime that I get the fiery fury of summertime. The poem courses through the mirrage of summer to find a shade of cool queititude.
Nice write!
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Sang to Ma Myrataal
After William Shakespeare Sonnet XXVI
S overeign lady, paid be homage due
A t all times more than duty double knit,
N or may it falter, comets, stars pursue
G rooved orbits which Time alters not a whit.
T hy star my sky fills till my wit no clue
O f how to live without or how to show it,
M eanders mazy seeking overview,
A s, fair, once bare, wide world, aware, may know it.
M ay summer's sun song sung that guides my moving
Y our aspects clement comment to cement
R espect unchallenged worth that needs no proving,
A rtful searching verse rehearsed, consent.
TA ke the homeless hour as heady ties,
ALlow choice spread voice yeast, let soul’s bread rise.
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Very Good!
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Oh it sings dear poet, it definitely sings
Love, C
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This verse has a soft sadness in the begining then ends on a great positive.
Loved this line it puts the beauty in the sadness.
sweet Love has been spreading its wings;
so come on, Baby,
let's join in hearts' singing
come on, Baby, let's see what summer may bring!
Great write!
Honoring a great woman!
~Lifetime~
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Familiar Rythym
nicely done - all I need now is a mint julep, a fan and a front porch swing
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This is really good. I can relate to it very much, especially since the weather where I live has been incredible the last few weeks =)
It's nice how this poem considers all the lonely hearts out there who have no one to share the sun with
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Summertime, the time for everything. Enjoy the bounty of summer, it will change to autumn, to winter and then begin again with spring. Enjoy it now while it is the here and now. {Note: It's the beginning of winter here and I miss the summertime already}
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I love the contrast in this piece. It was really uplifting and sad at the same time.
My parents are south african so I know a bit of Afrikaans. I went to a couple school days on holiday in south africa with my cousin and she had some afrikaans periods which helped -
This is a beautifully-written piece and a perfect re-interpretation of the classic song. I enjoyed this immensely, Myra.
Bill
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This brought a smile to my face. If yearning was money I'd be the richest man alive. You know how to push all my buttons....lol. Good luck in the contest.
Sincerely,
Leo Long
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Beautiful flowing write full of romanticism
Another piece well done myrataal!
Good Luck to you!
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let's join in hearts' singing
come on, Baby, let's see what summer may bring!
wow this is a strong statement
i like this, yeah i wanna join
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