Time passes and names scribed,
of dead soldiers ,on stones
And winds of time whisper through,
erasing all names
On gravestones,
names of those who seized the day;
to save ours
And winds of time whisper through
Some were country and some city folk,
boys and girls we never knew
Fighting a war, far from our view,
far from home
We brought them home,
with wisdom written on stones;
and winds of time whisper through,
erasing all names
Less we forget,
they are our sons and daughters,
soldiers that seized the day,
to save ours
Let this be the wisdom,
that their names be written
on the winds of time
and in all spirits, forever to dwell
Remember them well,
all those fallen
On sacred stones, their names
Where the wind whispers farewell
A contest entry
- Poems to support our soldiers, not our twisted government by ecrivain01.
1150 points, ended June 9, 2008, 6 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 5 of 5
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wow
Some of the lines are so moving..."where the wind whispers farewell"...and I really like the beginning and the title is beautiful as well. -
Oops.
I must have missed it before, but in line 9, you mean "some were", not "some where". You might want to fix that. -
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fixed that typo .."some were" funny thing those things we miss...and spell ..and I'm happy you are there when I trip ..
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This is really a good job ...
however, there are a few places that are a bit awkward and could be reworded. In the main, though, I like it very much. -
I could (almost) write a book just trying to say how and why this touching write effects me so much. You have done an awesome job with this, a beautiful tribute. I especially love stanzas four and six.
~Kristy
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