I see myself falling apart....
And I promise you, I do not mean it.
I see the hopelessness in your eyes as I dare not let you enter,
(((I'm sorry Love, I'm just trying to protect you from this darkness.))))
We all have things we must bear, to carry and cry,
Why must you insist on trying to hold hands with me in this emptiness?
It has taken me so long to do this on my own...
And yet you entered my heart and want to carry it.
I love you so much and I am angered as to why this demon suffocates me,
I'm trying so hard to come up for air, to see your face once more...
You try to pull me up only to see me go deeper in this abyss.
I'm sorry Honey, you are doing everything right, I promise.
I die everytime I see this affect our marriage and love.
(((I know you'll always love me, but I'm scared that you'll run away)))
How could I blame you? You never asked for all of this...
The mood swings, the funerals, the judgement calls.....SO MUCH!!!!
My Love, You are my Rock, you keep me going on the darkest of days,
You can make me so mad, and somehow I am still so MADLY in love with you.
Through my hardships I can always find my constant companion by my side,
Holding me, letting me cry on that strong shoulder of his, loving me more.
((((Thank you T Bear*))))
Author notes
TO MY HUSBAND: He is my Rock, but he always wants to fix things, and there are some things he can't fix, like my depression. He helps more than he'll ever know, but yet I can see the helplessness and frustration coming from him when he can't do anything about it. Breaks my heart that I make him feel that way.
How do you feel when you read this poem?
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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outstanding/understanding
This is really sad for you hun. No matter how much we want to be fixed, it wont happen. Trying to get others to know that... its really challenging. Just hang in there. There is always hope and you must hang on to that. But, you cant get frustrated with him just for trying and loving. That is the coping that we must slowly let out so we dont implode... right? You decleraction of him is really compelling and I am sure he apprciates it as well. It all takes time and courage and FAITH! I wish you luck and all my best sweetie. I really feel for you. Loves ya!
MCL!!
me
A little smile to make you smile!
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wow tears formed in my eyes reading this.. life has its rough spots but the ones you truly love and truly love you will never leave.. great write. shows so much feeling! keep on writing
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This is so sweet. It's so beautiful. You're such a great wife. You'll make it through this. As long as you have eachother.
I missed your writing!
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This is beautiful Sara i loved it!
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Together you can beat it,Sara. Let him in,just alittle. Give him a chance to help. He is not like the others that failed you, he is willing to go the distance and stand next to you, not behind.
Trust in your love enough to go forward, without looking back.
Love you~
Deena
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It wouldn't let me applaud
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I love you baby
but don't try to protect me from your darkness. Let me in. Let me cast it aside, banish it from your soul. I can't make you stop feeling sad and angry sometimes, but I can wipe clean this dark cloud you carry if you let me. It rains down on you taking you further from me. If you don't let me in it will carry us both away. I can clear the haze if you let me. That's all I ask. Just let me save you from your demons. If I can't save you then we bear them together. Double team, two on one, they'll never stand a chance.
I Love You Starlet,
T.B.
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this was very deep. very good job!
~summerKiss -
For better or worse, isn't that the truth? I can relate to this all too well. I hope you let him see this poem. Come to think of it, I may bookmark it for my very own "Rock."
Intensely expressive.
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Cory loves you with all of his heart, and when he sees his beautiful wife in pain, he's in pain. Try not to push him away huni, because that will not only hurt you, but him too, and neither one of you deserve that. He's here for you, I'm here for you. I can relate to this so much because Earl's always trying to protect me, help me, and sometimes he just can't. I love you sis, and I'm always here for you to talk to, to lean on, to vent to, anything. I will do anything for you!
LaLa
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I can see your concern and your heart in each of your word here..I love the its intensity and honesty which you brought with your soul..well done...
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