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Autumn Haiku











 
a rose bud's
sprouting from the fir tree!
a cardinal's perch












Author notes


Written November 0th, 2003

In a list

What did you think

    I plan to revise this poem: please leave constructive criticism!
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Comments

1 - 8 of 8

  • Alahmorah
    January 8, 2005
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    Beautiful....as I can say of all your poetry.


  • Maatkara gold member
    October 26, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you, Patti Yes, they are a great mental and conceptual challenge. I love the discipline required to present an image and revelation in so few words.

    ~ G


  • AngelSeeker silver member
    October 26, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    You're right I did like this one. Haiku has gotten to be one of my favorite forms. It will never take the place of other poetry in my heart, but I love it for the intellectual thrill. Thank you for pointing me to this, and thanks for commenting on my birds haiku. Patti

  • nchunn59
    August 3, 2004
    Edit | Reply

    10/10

    wow this is very beautiful loved it as I see others do too.anyway good job again and keep up the wonderful work!
    sadie


  • MargaretG
    June 30, 2004
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    Clever and clear imagery

    This is a perfect double take! The first two lines describe an unlikely event, the last resolves it into a beautiful and natural scene. Your reply to a comment is most helpful in understanding the process of writing haiku. (Congratulate me, I've been accepted to round 3 of AP Idol.)


  • December 31, 2003
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    So who is using last line zingers now my poetic friend? Fun isn't it. You got me on this one, after I read about the rose sprouting from the fir tree, I thought you had lost it, untill I read the last line. Great work. I too have see the cardinals this time of year but I never had the imagination to see them as roses blooming from the tree. Great work.

  • Maatkara gold member
    December 27, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Thanks for your comments, Bill Actually, that is exactly as I saw it. That gorgeous little bird, like a scarlet rose, up in the evergreen - a true 'Haiku moment'. I'm just as new at this site as you; only started posting here this evening. I'm still groping around, trying not to fall over the 'furniture'! lol
    ~Maatkara


  • BillS2
    December 27, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    Excellent

    Hi Maatkara:
    Nice sense of humor in Haiku. Excellent! Glad you put the illustrations at the side, all different color roses these days. Do Cardinals come in those colors as well? Only kidding. I am still learning on how to reply and edit on this site. Be patient with me. Thanks. Bill

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