She arrived at their school that morning,
all the boys taking acute notice,
bolting upright as she passed
as they beheld her exquisite, exotic beauty.
They all desired to be the one holding her hand
that seemed to float before them through an ethereal mist
as it captured beams of sunlight
and sent them spiraling through unearthly dimensions
toward their defenseless, transfixed eyes…
They all wondered who she would pick,
and they all had the highest of hopes and wildest of imaginings…
The best among them quickly got together
and devised a short skit for the school assembly later that day-
they would all be princely suitors, surrounding her,
kneeling on one knee
as she sat upon their highest pedestal
listening to their woos and pleas, accept their gifts of adoration,
and then making her decision…
The curtains rose.
She stared out blindly into the darkening glare of the hushed, jostling crowd,
wondering what faces were out there,
faces that she could have seen were the spotlight not upon her…
The 'princely suitors' arrived and circled the high pedestal,
kneeling on their knee, preparing to deliver their devotions
and presenting their gifts, with hopes of winning her hand…
Suddenly she made an irrestible decision to take matters into her own hands,
to save them from themselves, and herself from enduring their demise-
she burst out into a spontaneous, improvised passionate performance of her own…
“Kind and gallant princes, before you utter a word or sing a single note
let me first thank you for coming before me,
and then let me tell you why your efforts will be all be for naught,
lost and futile upon this cold and unfeeling heart…”
The suitors were taken aback, but allowed her to go on;
the crowd did not notice, and leaned in for the show…
“For you see, like all of you, I am in love,
in love with the handsomest prince that ever walked the face of the earth…”
Here she slowly and dramatically begins to descend the high pedestal,
and she continues is a singsong voice…
“When he sings, the heavens thunder!
When he smiles, the sun shines through the darkest clouds;
his golden shield blazes with the brightest fires of truth and justice
while his eyes are the warmest coals
that can melt even the softest spring rose…”
Here she reaches the first kneeling prince and, bidding him to rise,
cues him to begin a mock ballroom dance with her…
“When he dances, the Seven Graces dance with him,
spinning in a dizzying ecstasy…”
Here she goads the prince to spin in a pirouette under her raised finger,
and as he spins, she abandons him in a melancholy gesture
and bends toward the next princely suitor…
“When he runs, the four winds follow, but none can keep pace with his swiftness…”
Here, she nudges the prince to do a slow jog toward Stage Right.
As he obediently traverses the stage, she continues,
“He runs, never to return!”
The running 'prince' suddenly realizes his unfortunate situation,
and he visibly submits to his lowly fate,
ready to disappear Stage-Right, when she adds,
“but then he returns!”
Everyone in the audience caught the light on the prince’s face as he turned,
his hopes renewed…
She spun toward the next ‘prince’ and bid him to rise…
“When he thinks,”
and here she hints for him to strike a thinking pose
by emphasizing word ‘think’,
“even the atoms that surround him pause to listen,
and the air vibrates with the undulations of his mighty thoughts…”
Then, abandoning him with a sigh,
she dramatically and slowly begins to ascend their high pedestal again…
Before the suitors could turn to catch a glimpse of her,
the flowing form they all desired so,
she turned, freezing them in their stance with a sudden outburst…
“But alas!"
"Just as all of you have placed me on this, your highest of pedestals…”
and here she ascends a few more steps, and repeats the teasing ritual-
sensing and turning before they could steal their cherished glimpse…
“The dear, mighty prince of my heart sits this very moment
on an even higher pedestal…”
Another step, another play…
“a pedestal that I have given him, and that he graciously sits upon
for me to behold whenever my fancy flights will have it…”
She reaches the top and then sits, gracefully and sadly,
having beat her suitors out of their wishful glimpses…
“and just as you have placed me here upon this, your high pedestal,
your hearts beating with high hope,
my heart, as yours, beats in vain,
for my mighty prince, the King of all my Dreams,
is but an imaginary man, a gilded shadow fashioned by a wishful mind,
a golden statue that forever stands, staring out upon his adoring world,
unmoving, unseeing, unspeaking, unfeeling;
yet I, like all of you, am captivated,
as I am fated to forever be until the day that I wither away and die…”
The suitors thought she was through,
but reeling with her sudden and insightful improvisations
they wavered in their surprise, revelation, and confusion;
in the moment wondering whether they should continue with their presentations…
She upstaged them once again to offer up one last insight
into the tragic human existence that is life…
“and as for thee, my fine suitors,
even as I pine away into nothingness for my mighty imaginary prince,
I shall turn you all into my loyal subjects,
pledged to the meager beauty that I possess,
and slaves to your own uncontrollable drives and desires
as I have you do my every bidding…"
and, to their perplexed looks, she added,
"but know, that I will have pity upon your unfortunate souls,
for I too know the folly of the human heart all too well…”
and with that, she deftly signaled the stagehands to slowly dim the lights
and draw the curtains to a close
as she lowered her countenance and bearing in a reticent lament,
to the final shock of the darkened auditorium audience who were silenced,
but for one echoing clap that hovered in the air for a moment then died away…
In a list
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 23 of 23
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wow... this is awesome... very well written!!! YOu did a great job on this one!!!! I really like this!!!
Hugs,
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A bit overly romanticized but then it's a play and so it fits in that respect. Frankly, it made me laugh a bit, from teh girl's viewpoint - at that age (and this is just me assuming it's teen-ish) - if that many boys paid attention to me in such a manner, I'd have bolted (so shy) or were I brave, I'm sad to say I may have played on them, as I saw other girls do.
Regardless, I really liked this, the intro stanza was lovely and even tho it's just a skoosh overly done for me, I can let that roll if I read it as intended (as a play) instead of analyzing. Interesting stuff!
. Rewarded 8
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what a great scenario you pourtrayed here bringing an intriguing and quite intersting scenaes arround the words..I love this wonderful write..thanks for sharing it...
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Oh. This is an interesting poem kind of play that you have written here. I liked this. I wasn't sure what to expect when I clicked on it but I thought it was pretty cool. I guess I took it to me that the girl was saying that you can't love someone for how they look because how they look has nothing to do with who they really are. Is that what you meant here? I thought you did a good job with this.
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I haven't really analyzed it, I just played it out... but thanks for asking, I'll jump at the chance to try- you know I'm a guy, so the piece is from a guy's standpoint, and the depiction of the guys is authentic! However, as understanding as I may be as to the female heart and mind, I am still a guy, and could only imagine how a girl would react- so this is my attempt...
Also I (a guy) see girls as knowing they have this weapon of physical beauty that attracts guys at their disposal, and this is how a new girl might have used it, a girl who only adequately tends to her looks (which is enough to drive a normal guy wild!) how guys usually react to it, and how such a girl might react such guys who usually have less experience in the ever-confounding matters of the heart...
I know, too many words! -
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Oh. I guess.
I'm a girl and I don't remember it ever being like that for me. I guess I'm not pretty enough to make guys act weird like that or anything. And I do tend to my looks and try to look nice but it sounds like you're talking about those few girls that seem to look perfect. And that's just not the rest of us.
When you were describing the girl in the beginning, it made me think of times when I was in school and how their were a few girls like that, that got all the boys attention. And basically what you're not thinking about, is that while you guys are staring at that one girl, there's all these other girls in the room who are forgotten. And why? Because they can't be as pretty as her? How is that fair? And how do you think the rest of us girls feel? I felt pretty ugly and sad about it because I'm a good person but it just isn't enough if I don't look like some like that girl.
So if you guys are just being guys, I hope you know that you make a lot of other girls cry. -
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yes, primitive, I know...
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This poetic/romantic play set my heart into a frenzy as i was not sure how it was going to go...you did a good detailed play , I felt the excitment and the unknown wonderment, good job , I enjoy your short! plays or stories...good luck/Linda
. Rewarded 4
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I thought It said "short poem"!
Very nice poem, dear.
Thank you for sharing.
Sophie.
x
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thanks, now you'll have some ammunition next time you're placed on a pedestal...!
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Nah, I'm not really that much of a "diva" to be like that.
I don't abuse someone's feelings.
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Trying to come up with a reply, I came up with a new quote... "Love is like an anthill- everyone is always stepping all over everyone."
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Again, I look like a minx, but I'm not! (:
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The would-be-suitors placed the exotic,exquisite girl on the highest pedastal in their wildest imaginings because they were lusting after her form, she held another with hope in her heart on a pedastal for he would not simply fulfill what the eye sees but what the heart needs, I noted she described all of his attributes except the physical form and the suitors noted no other attribute than her appearance. I liked the poetic play, it reminded me both of a Greek tragedy and,in parts, had a Shakespearian influence.
One part caused me to pause and re read " kneeling on each of their bended knees,preparing to deliver their suits" May I tentatively suggest instead something akin to " kneeling on bended knees, preparing to offer their pledges to this deity?" I know that is not quite in keeping with your voice but as it stands it lends itself to the allusion that each suitor was kneeling on each others knee and it doesn't sound right to offer a suit, it gives the imagery of offering a jacket and trousers in double breasted Worcester. However, that is not a criticism per se, simply a perspective shared dear poet.
. Rewarded 8
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lol at the misconstrued imagery my jumbled attempt caused you- pretzel men indeed... you actually hit on a phrase I was wrestling with, and could not quite get right- and I thank you for not indulging me on it- (for readers will indulge us thrice, I believe, in any one piece!) for recreating a scene adequately with words is a very important backdrop in a message/emotion piece such as this is endeavoring to be...
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Bless you for accepting it was simply a perspective shared, lol at pretzel man, and who wouldn't like to be indulged thrice, verily I say unto you that thrice is thrice as nice as being indulged once!
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the 'thrice' is science- so I say- I've deduced it myself from performing/listening to music- no need to sweat over trying to give a perfect performance when the audience will allow you three glaring gaffs (as long as you don't get flustered and quickly cover them up respectably! Which in music means a short burst of staccato, which acts as a memory eraser...) In the written world I'm not sure how to make amends except to correct the mistake before it is too late- and AP serves just fine as a testing ground...
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AND thanks for your insight which I did not see- the physical/non-physical aspects at play... this is a girl that perhaps knows her physical powers, and its limitations in fulfillment...
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This was interesting, and was predictable and unexpected at the same time. We all knew that the 'exotic beauty' would choose none of the suitots that stood before her; if you have to ask, you obviously can't, But I didn't see her having her prince be imaginary. I think what she speaks of rings true for every girl out there; we do want perfection, but are willing to omit a few minor details, but many, many egotistical fools lack even a satisfactory foundation. I may not be nearly as beautiful as the girl in this play/poem, but I understand her pain completely. this was a very amazing write, and I am very grateful that you have shared this with all of us. Thank you, and good job. ^_^
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This is very interesting. I could feel the life in your words. I like where you went with it. Bravo! Shancy.
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O how does one 'break' the girl? I have to find her! Untouchable love oftentimes seems to be the most alluring. You have a great gift for riding the so many different levels of the human heart. Beautifully done. Thank you!
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This was very exciting to read! I loved it all the way through.
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Oh how cruel is romantic love and all it's fancies, yet exposed for what it is, the light grows dim.
. Rewarded 4
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