Continents away, miles apart,
she holds your hand, I hold your heart.
She hears your voice, I hear your mind,
I see your soul, her eyes are blind.
She has memories, I have dreams,
hers fill an ocean, mine, a stream.
She bore your son, my womb is bare,
she hears your heart, your heart I share.
She shares your bed, you sleep in mine,
she cooks for you, with me you dine.
She hears your dreams, I make them true,
I own your heart, but she owns you.
She wears a ring on her left hand,
yet my heart wears your wedding band.
She sleeps in peace, I'm wide awake,
I am your wife...she's your mistake.
Continents away, miles apart...
she holds your hand, I hold your heart.
Author notes
"dipit"-to be placed in AN for contest
A contest entry
- While I Sleep (picture prompt) *judged tomorrow* by delightfulmess.
450 points, ended May 31, 2008, 19 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Finding Love [True Love Waits Forever][Awaiting Arrival Of Unborn Child] by stargazer..
400 points, ended April 20, 62 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Jeff's first year by cricketjeff.
4620 points, ended October 5, 2008, 64 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Loving You From Afar. by Poetryintheblood.
450 points, ended September 18, 2008, 20 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me feeling by Cant force beloved.
700 points, ended December 10, 2008, 57 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Give me anything! by ASmileForYou.
560 points, ended December 16, 2008, 138 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - All imPortant contest by solitarytear.
854 points, ended July 23, 37 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 57 of 57
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I am loving this rhyme sceme. It flows like water
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I am loving this rhyme sceme. It flows like water
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Wow.... this is very sad to me. People stay together so often because of children, I know I did for a long time...
Excellent flow and rhyme here. I got swept up in the rythm, and I can't honestly give you any areas that I would revise.
Good poem.
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I must say, its a wonderful write for such a subject, and truthful indeed...great rhyme, the flow kept on the entire piece...and I could feel the pain, I was there with your words, excellent job....
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Oh Wow
the content is so heart wrenching I love it.
it flows well and the rhyming is well done.
it moved me
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thank you
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nice job
i love it at first you think you are the other women and then you find out its the other way around ...i love it ..even tho its sad and slight depressing its very good..nice writte and keep up the good work
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Most Beautiful
This is a beautiful and well writtte poem. The ending is absolutely brilliant. I would not change a word. I really liked this work of yours. It is powerful. -
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Thank You,
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Wonderful in every way.
I think this is absolutely brilliant and absolutely perfect.
I really, really love it.
Jenny
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Thank you
Blessings,
Sassy
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Wow.
I seriously don't know what to say.
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Aw, i want to cry,that was so good!
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Thank you Nettles
Happy Holidays,
Sassy
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amazing
had to applaud again this should be published -
thumbs up
this I know well, really well done speaks volumes
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thank you
Blessings,
Sassy
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This is the best poem i have ever read in my whole life. Seriously its perfect, my whole body went cold and I can feel what you feel, im entering this contest in a minute when something comes to me but I would gladly nominate this for gold straight away, just amazing well done kathrin xx
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thank you Kathrin, blessings to you and yours
Sassy
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Ouch
This write is beautiful. The story is not! Such a sad write and a story that many can relate to. Sorry that anyone should know this feeling. Good luck in the contest, but more so in life, The Shaker
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Thank you for your comments and your sentiments...that is, for my luck in life I have a wonderful life filled with love for God and family. I have a wonderful husband and 3 beautiful children/2 grandchildren. The above write is not related to my life, neither to my personal experiences, it is fictional. Many of my writes are non-fictional and based on my personal life experiences, beliefs, thoughts, etc. Fiction or non, however, I write most often not for myself but to reach an audience. The above was written with those others in mind who live and love in the cyber world.
Many blessings to you and yours,
Sassy
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Excellent poetry, beautifully written and cleverly worked.
Lots of luck in this
Jeff
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Congratulations on such a successful contest and thanks for the hm
blessings,
Sassy
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Thank you for your beautiful entry, good luck in my contest, Josie
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Wow
Extremely powerful emotion in every word.
I'm speechless, forgive me. It is absolutely *perfect!
In every way it can be.
Loved it!
Congrats on the gold.
It is well deserved.
Thanks for sharing.
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this is one of the most beautiful pieces i have read... and totally understood. sometimes i think the internet is a bad thing in a way coz its too easy to get our hearts broken. a loss we can do nothing about. im so sorry its like this for you but believe me ive been through it.
hugs,
georgie,
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I was compelled against my will to sympathize with the speaker in this poem. I can't pick a favorite line; they are all so artfully written--definitely a gold trophy poem. This poem just took my breath away--what more can I say?
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thank you, jade
sassy
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As i read this poem i can feel the words you have written. I have never beenthe other but have had friends that have told me how they felt and what they thought. You've capture the emotions with words that tell a story. Awesome writing. Thanks for the read and keep on writing
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wow
so many women feel this way when in relationships ,men full of love and promises that are broken, well written been there done that you have written of it beautiflly good luck in contest
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This is so beautiful, and yes I have felt this way before. This is actually one of the many poems I've read, that has actually made me cry. Very emotional. I love it! Good luck in all the contest you entered.
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Wow it's a beautiful poem. The cadence of the words and the contrasting imagery of the two women who are tied to the same man is very strong. I understand these emotions. I've gone through them before, and reading this poem squeezed my heart.
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Loved this poem! Good rhythm and rhyme, an easy read. Leaves the reader a bit in the void - the lost love with a partner whereby you can only sit back and watch your own world disappear. One's heart can never cheat ... Thank you for this contribution!
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This poem is really amazinggg! I totally love it. You deserve that gold trophy I love how you rhymed it yet, it was still so emotional and touching. This poem will reach out to those who have been in a painful relationships. My favourite lines would probably be lines 7, 13, and 14. This poem is VERY VERY well written!
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run for the hills!!!
this is a very hard place for you to be,
i am sorry for you and i feel that a man who
does this to women should really check himself.
i also think you deserve a full relationship.
i know its a hard place for you to be in.
but remember what comes around goes around.
chances are you are not the only one.
men who cheat are not to be trusted.
he is not only cheating on his wife but he is cheating on his family too. and lets say he leaves her he will do it to you. even if he says he loves you.
its based on deception. i send you prayers and hope you can find a man to give you a complete commitment.
also be safe take care of yourself first.
a hug
c
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thank you for your sincere, well thought out advice, and condolences. Though often my writes are personal, and based on personal experiences this one is not. However, fiction or non, I write to reach an audience, often times you have to step outside of your mind and into someone else's to reach them I am very happily married to a wonderful man and have been for many years. But, should I ever find myself in this position...I will definately "run for the hills"
Blessings,
Sassy
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Oh, WOW! That's touching. I find the lines "She bore your son, my womb is bare" and "I am your wife...she's your mistake" tear jerking. I was at the end when I began to understand it, but it's very good. Keep up the good work, and may God be with you
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That was REALLY REALLY well done, I am amazed, no doubt!!!!!!!
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What a well deserved Gold.Tells of many a womans pain in the arms of a married man.Who do we try to fool in the end though if not ourselves.Whilst he has the best of everything, she has nothing but an empty bed and a broken heart.An excellent poem yet agian.Well done, Ros
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thank you, Ros
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Wow this was so beautiul and deeply emotional. Loved it!! Congrats on the gold, definately well-deserved
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OMG... 
So very powerful.. My my.. I am blown away here thank you for entering my contest.
Delila
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thank you for the gold and for posting the beautiful pic for inspiration
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I Loved This Poem I swear when i was reading i felt the emotion around me and i'm a beginner at this and i think this is a wonderful poem
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I loved the story behind this poem, and the [seeming] transition through time it seems to make. When I read the first quatrain, I thought it was a poem about very literal unrequited love; by the second one, I was almost positive. The third quatrain made me a little suspicious, because I in no way condone cheating in any way, and I thought you were implying that you were the other woman. The last one left me a little undecide; I can't tell if you're talking about another woman, or a lack of communication with your own husband. But, this is one of those poems that you don't have to comletely understand to appreciate the beauty of the words and simplet rhyme. Good job ^_^
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brilliant
I feel that poems that include simple rhymes are generally ineffective...but this is so well written you must succumb to its beauty. brilliant...as if i can see this all unfolding thru a camera. brilliant job
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thank you hardee, I reflect the same feelings with free-verse, but occassionaly I come across one that simply amazes me.
blessings,
Sassy
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I absolutely love it.
This is great.
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Absolutely beautiful. I don't know what else to say
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This is very deep and very good. I could see every thing. The way you detailed it is so good. Keep writin
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Gosh this is a heart tugger. There are very few winners when love is divided but then love is love, you have expressed the pain and the softness of the emotions brilliantly. Good luck in the contest, the feelings captured in this are very well penned.
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WOW!!!
Am not the only one feeling this way? This poem totally grasped my heart in levels... wow!!!!!
Absolutely amazing write this needs to win a gold or something in a contest. Definetely needs to be published!
Thank you for featuring it!
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thanks, MJ, its purpose is served if it grasped your heart
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The rhyme and structure of the poem are incredible. I have been in a relationship such as the one you describe. You have done a nice job describing your view.
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wow
It was such a beautiful poem, by saying beautiful, i mean the way it was written. Its an excellent poem to read.
The rhyme worked very successfully and it was full of feeling.
my favourite lines were:
She hears your dreams, I make them true,
I own your heart, but she owns you.
Those 2 lines seem so true to so many peoples lives.
it was an amazing poem.
thank you for sharing this with us.
keep writing,
holly x
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thank you,
no, not from personal experience, just a vivid imagination combined with true life stories I've heard along the way
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Excellent
A very nice write. Hopefully, not from personal experience. Your imagery, rhythm and rhyme are just fine.
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