Mommy, mommy I can’t wait,
to realize my very fate.
I’ll try so hard and do what’s right,
next to you, we’ll win this fight.
I know life is hard for you right now,
but hold my hand and I’ll show you how.
Wait mommy what’d you say,
no longer can I stay?
But, daddy please cant you hear,
oh God mommy I’m right here.
Please, I’m real don’t you understand,
just look at fingers, feet, and hand.
No, no, no this is all wrong,
life is my destiny, I wish it long.
Please don’t take my breath away,
I’ll be so good if you let me stay.
This is not what God meant for me,
Jesus wanted me to live so happily.
I was told a mother had unconditional care,
they told me she was honest, just and fair.
Please just let me have this life,
please, oh please put down your knife.
Owe, my mommy this pain is real,
don’t you get it, I can feel?
Well, mommy I guess this is goodbye,
now forever I will lie.
Please remember the life I could be,
tell daddy not to forget about me.
Don’t forget I am your kin,
please remember this deadly sin.
But though you destroyed my chance at life,
I’ll forgive you for this strife.
And though my breath will soon reach demise,
I’ll watch you through heaven’s eyes.
My mommy and daddy I love you so,
while you live on earth I’ll watch you grow.
A contest entry
- Abortion. by DAMSELx.
450 points, ended June 15, 2008, 38 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Abortion! Is it your choice? by ForeverLastingComa.
600 points, ended June 11, 2008, 27 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Whatever Your Heart Desires by xxhoopstar21xx.
300 points, ended June 8, 2008, 61 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Any lines your hated.. maybe liked??
Comments
1 - 7 of 7
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wow!!!
wow!! omg that is sooooooo good! thank so u sooooo sooo much for entering.. this one is going on the finalist list and is either gunna win or get a honorable mention!
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This piece is so good. It's so well written and so deep... I really, really like it. And you have been able to rhyme in a very good and natural way.
And a good point of view - respect for the part who's not able to talk. The respect for a new life.
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PS I have a child and I was scared but now a year later I cant imagine my life without him
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I have read a true story on abortion and because of that it is hard for me to read any more to hear of that womens suffering after she gave her child away I am so glad that you have decided to write on keeping the child
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wow, that really touched me..i enjoyed how you wrote this from the deported childs point of view, very intersting...the beggining of this poem drew my attention at start and just had me wanting to finish it..my only comment towards you is to you spell check next time..that's..my favorite lines were,
"I was told a mother had unconditional care,
they told me she was honest, just and fair.
Please just let me have this life,
please, oh please put down your knife.
Owe, my mommy this pain is real,
don’t you get it, I can feel?"
thank you for entering and good luck
~*ForeverLastingComa aka Leesha*~ -
Try less boring rhymes next time,
It could really get someone's attention. -
This really draws you in and makes you read more. This is a very sad poem indeed. And if you think abortion is bad, just think of the infinitely innumerable people who never even get the chance to feel the tinge of life.
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