Reflection Of A Year Ago

Ground Hog Day 2006

It was a year ago today
I went away
To the hospital
Lutheran General
I was sent away
I was gone
The world did not wait
20 days
I was an inmate

My state of mind
Dramatically Changed
I was told
My thoughts were wrong
My actions were stupid!
Verbal comments were odd
Verbal comments were also disturbing

My mind was on trial
Plead.!?
Innocent
Judgment!?!
Guilty,
Of chemical imbalance
Sentence.!?
Zoloft!

Zoloft!!!
It fucked me up!
Hallucinations everywhere
Though I think,
They’re called memories
On the first day
And the second day
For the remaining eighteen days
I was dead tired
Absolutely wiped out
As my knowledge of outside 5-West

A huge jump
In absences at my school
And that’s not even including me
People only came
To speak with me
To see my shirts
To see the stupid things I do

I missed the attention,
Of my friends at school
At 5-West
I only talked to others
As fucked up as myself
But ones who were also worse
Drug abuse,..
Manic bipolar,..
Victims

My parents
They were much of the problem
That brought me there
They didn’t help me
Much in there either

When I returned home
I was an outpatient
I just wanted out
I was tired with uniformity
For seven more days
I toiled
Without help
No ethos
No pathos
No logos
Nothing but homework to do

Returning to school
A happy time for me!
Friends, what I see!
A teaching what I receive!

For a month afterwards
I was happy!
Though crazier than ever!..
It evened out
After another month
It evened out
I was back to my previous being
Exhausted very easily
Lower than content
Back to not liking school

This is, the way I am!
The way I was
Due to my experience
Ground-Hog Day 2005
Being in 5-west for a full month

Though I’m still depressed today
It is not
To the pre-5-west extent