*
Embrace my creepy soul crawling for you.
Oh! Beauty divine,
Caress my naked heart purpled on the floor,
Then leave a drowsy kiss beating on my skin.
With your trembling vicious lips, on my purple wings,
Watch me breathing my eternal sin.
And I’ll hide in the corners of my dreams
And I’ll wish to see you under stars and dimes
So I can draw a smile on my face
And finally
I die tonight…
*
...
Comments
1 - 17 of 17
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Embrace my creepy soul crawling for you.
Oh! Beauty divine,
Caress my naked heart purpled on the floor,
Then leave a drowsy kiss beating on my skin.
With your trembling vicious lips, on my purple wings,
Watch me breathing my eternal sin
alll of the above made me just go 'oooooooooo' i think this is beautifully written. a really fantastic piece of work and im glad i had the chance of coming across it.
Laura. -
I love the color purple. I like how you use it as an adjective in the third line. Happy Halloween!
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There is a gentle sadness here, as of someone who has given up. Good vivid imagery.
Well done.
Garrison
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"And I’ll wish to see you under stars and dimes
So I can draw a smile on my face
"
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ha3! u made an account
yay! i love me haha 
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"a drowsy kiss beating on my skin"
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"your trembling vicious lips, on my purple wings"
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"hide in the corners of my dreams"
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sometimes it strikes me as totally new...this weakness of yours,this fragile sensitivity...and then i remember that u're made of it...it's there...underlying the firecracker and the noise...
so this is when ur true nature shows...when hurt makes it resurface...this is when u reveal urself and each aching word of urs vibrates in my soul like mozart's requiem...
beautiful write lil sis
beautiful...
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when come and death collide
hummm....
dunno. I think you started out okay but you just lost me when you went into the imagery that you did. You left me hanging. Which are you referring to anyway... love or death?
keep writing. We only improve if we keep up writing. That goes for us all. Me included. I get better each and every time I pick up a pen and put it to paper.
trekkergirl
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well, i hate to xplain my poems, i like to keep the freedom of the reader floating,but anyway, this poem is talkin' abt and to death in general .. i hate to explain more, sorry..
but thanks for ur comment, nd yea i guess ur rite, we do get better each nd everytime
me
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ok ok it has been like 4ever since i read ur poems and this is really really so damn good , loved it loved it loved it u became realllllllllllly good
wow!!!
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thanks babe! we've missed you here
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Wow! That's pretty special. What a powerful message in so few words - none wasted at all. Very nicely done!
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Caress my naked heart purpled on the floor, Then leave a drowsy kiss beating on my skin. With your trembling vicious lips, on my purple wings, Watch me breathing my etrnal sin.
And I'll hide in the corners of my dreams, (That's the best line), And I'll wish to see you under stars and dimes So I can draw a smile on my face.
Those words are so hauntingly beautiful. It's like something scratched out on a suicide note, as a final plea to someone. I love it. -
loved it..
completely mezmerizing...
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I’ll hide in the corners of my dreams
And I’ll wish to see you under stars and dimes
So I can draw a smile on my face
And finally
I die tonight…
amazing wrie hun xxx -
Very cool. I love all the contradiction. It feels quite surreal at points. Another amazing write.
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wow tefy ^o)
this is pretty amazing.. actually its rly rly rly amazing!
everytime u post sthg it gets more n more amazing..
i totally love this and the ending is wonderful..
wow seriously.. i keep reading it over n over again..
great great one teftef!
~rana~
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WOW!!!!! There is a lot underlying in this one! I don't think I can put it into words, but I sure can feel it. You did a great job on this one.
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