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"All That Is Left To Give"

 

A fistfull of Nothings

and a handful of Empty;

Smiles have faded like a silken blouse,

worn too often and cleaned too harshly;

Not a single word left to say

neither with Love nor Anger;

The heart has stopped feeling

a wounded soul cries tears of silence;

The last dream disintegrated,

poisoned by one single action

and a word never spoken;

Silence is all that can be heard

in a bond that was merely pretend;

A fistfull of Nothings

and a handful of Empty;

Author notes

I hope the words speak for themselves

A contest entry

any critique is very welcome [as long as it is done with courtesy and constructive to my learning. I thank you.

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Comments

1 - 16 of 16

  • poetryality silver member
    October 1, 2008

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    The words shared with a reader raises to heights the silent screams that many suffer. The tranquilty of this poem is stunning! Congratulations on winning the Bronze Cup. You are dearly missed dear sister. Can't wait to see you scribe something new. Your absence is heavily felt. I Love YOU!


    Always ♥

    Renee


  • MargaretG
    July 7, 2008

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    This relates to a past pain which I lived in for months; your metaphors of empty hands and silent tears speak clearly. I paused on "poisoned by one single action" - there was a final cause.
    The feeling here is desolation and hopelessness. It seems eternal while it lasts. I like the repetition of the first two lines, but you have spelled fistful two ways.
    Hugs, sweetness!


  • PerVirtuous
    June 22, 2008

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    The opposite of love is not hate, but indifference. You seem to have captured that here. This is powefully stark and intuits the impersonal nature of the universe. Have three more bunnies.


    • cherche -d -ame
      June 23, 2008

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      indiffernce indeed. I wrote it, you interpreted it, and thereby actually made self realize that it is this indifference that spoke those words. Thank you,
      reenie


  • Errant Panther gold member
    June 10, 2008

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    Deeply emotive and haunting piece, the sadness of lamenting words left unsaid just ooze from the page, and the image from Liliana Sanches pulls the entire thing together beautifully.

    • cherche -d -ame
      June 10, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      thank you kindly for this review. That is good enough for me. I got across exactly what it was that I tried to and the interpretation can then be left open to the reader. Your comment means a lot,
      reenie


  • JohnnyD gold member
    May 29, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Hey?




    Len


  • Blushfulmoon silver member
    May 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply

    excellent~

    You hit the nail on the head with this poem sis...
    A fistful of nothings and a handful of Empty
    And indeed your words do speak for themselves...
    Best of luck in the contest..this looks like a winner in my book
    How are things with ya sweetie send me an IM
    I got up 2 new ones that just won Gold I am tickled pink drop by if you can.....
    Love the pic goes right with the poem
    Hugs n love
    Susan~~~~

    • cherche -d -ame
      May 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      hello sweetie

      I will stop by as ap....just trying to catch up with thank yous right now. I feel so gulity, but neither Time nor Muse have been on my side as of late,
      much love
      xoxoxoxoxoxo
      reenie


  • tomisb
    May 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    there comes a time -- I don't know if something dies, the well runs dry or it was never real in the first place -- when all the pretense and promise becomes dust in the mouth and the heart beats aches instead of blood. You have caught this moment. Sadly.

    I know how much what you write is a personal reflection of where you are. May you not be here long.
    Love, Tom B.

    • cherche -d -ame
      May 30, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      thank you my friend

      indeed, it seems that you understood exactly where I am or was with this and your explanation of the dry well and the heart beating aches instead of blood -----and sawdust is all that is left in mouth.

      YOU know me., I know me...I thank you for the good wishes and I can promise you ...not how long I will be there, but that one of these days I will leave that place behind and return to my own authenticity [just too much at one time-and even the strongest buckle and fall to their knees now and then, oui?]

      But more important "How are you desr friend"? Think of you often....
      much love alwys
      xoxoxoxoxo
      reenie


  • Cannonsfire
    May 29, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    'disintergrated'......Now to the piece itself, this speaks volumes for the person speaking as to a person who has made false and misleading claims....nasty taste in your mouth. Love, C

    • cherche -d -ame
      May 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      thank youIt is now fixed{nasty taste in mouth are the exact words]maybe to be able to spit that out would be something left to give?
      much love sweet friend
      xoxoxoxoxo
      reenie


  • waydownuponjoy
    May 29, 2008

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    I beleive ...

    that you took this contest title to the degree required and did so with flair. It was rather depressing but I understood what you were sharing poetically and so therefore a good poem. I have a friend going through divorce and your poem sums up her very feelings. Good luck in the contest. joy

    • cherche -d -ame
      May 29, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      when I was done, I thought of the same thing [divorce]Even though this is about something different I can definitely see how your friend would feel like that. Thank so much for stopping by [heck, even still recognizing me]
      much love
      xoxoxoxoxoxo
      reenie

1 - 16 of 16