Starts off extremely colorful and metric.
I am a character, but no one I know.
My girlfriend is there, but she doesn't love me.
I have a child that I can never seem to find.
And I'm fighting for something I cannot grasp.
In fact, I can't even begin to say, or form the idea.
This time however, something has changed.
I spot a scout (an inorganic being) flying about
It is around the size of a kite, and reminds me
of a bubble. You know, the way you can see
every colour in it at the same time? But
it's shaped like a miniature angel, or a big
bat rather. I am not afraid of it, yet I'm not
all that trusting of it. I haven't encountered
an inorganic being in my dreams for ten
years, but they had taught me a lot when
I was younger. Like how to use my dreams
for anything imaginable, and other magic.
Upon coming into contact with these creatures
the dream gets clearer and you become more aware.
It is more real than the real world in a sense.
And that's when the tornados came, and I
saw human beings being biologically altered,
and mechanized. I saw our genes being
manipulated. I saw the world, and it saw me.
Analysis:
This dream worked in on me through many
different levels:
For one, it was an obvious warning about
things inside and outside of my spheres of control.
Two, Shows that I have a fear about overly controlling
my loved ones, and at the same time an acute fear of
losing them for any number of reasons.
Three, The tornado signifies a natural focusing of the
God head, or Demigurgas, and a transportation
somewhere else, the Scout, or 'angel' was just that,
an inorganic being, manipulating the energies in
my dream. The enhancement of colours was just
that, my growing awareness, and the distancing
of my inner Chi from where I began.
Author notes
Written December 25th, 2003
In a list
A contest entry
- Dream State by thephilosopher.
300 points, ended May 31, 2006, 10 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
What did you think
Comments
1 - 21 of 21
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Interesting poem. Thank you very much for entering. As far as the poem goes, I like it, the flow is interesting and your telling (or re-telling) of events creates a very clear image for me. My only complaint is the analysis at the bottom, it kinda threw me. Very nice poem though, overall.
Good luck in the contest,
KP -
interesting, and fun to read thanks for entering!
<3shelby -
This is such an original way of writing about the subject, I loved it. It's really well written and has beautiful descriptions that are never tiring, it's great. I think you should have won.
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This is really good, nd i really like it, even though you didn't write in your authors box what the D word was like i asked, even though i know what it is, oh well. Great write and thanks for entering
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You must admit I got you there.
Get it, spell MISSPELL?!
anyway, do your sics like this
[sic] because, that's the proper way. -
LMAO!!! 11!!!
11!!!!!! 11!!!!
I bet you fish for browns just like me! -
At least I can spell misspell
Captain wonderoos. -
Oh dear that CONCERNS me.
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Glad you can take honest criticism.You can mispel(sic)as many words as you like it does not bother me in the least.All the best ,RED
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Just kidding
I occasionally take a stab at humor,
Bear with me. -
Dear Red;
Thank you for the deep words of wisdom.
I will take your opinion and stow
On the shelf with my other dusty
opinions I've been collecting just
In case I decide to sodomize
a cold cup of cream later on in
Life. Per-chance I'm on some chilly
cold pond of submission
gazing at loons, dodging beaver
Somewhere east of Uranus
Probably Canada.
Sincerely
Horus8
Ps. Godhead's whatever
In the fuck I want it to be
because right now I'm naked
And strapped with dynamite
eating fruit in line at the
People's National bank.
Peace, keep penning!
Edited on Jan 12, 7:12 p.m. because ''. -
This seemed a bit childlike.Even with the explanation I did not find it alluring.Narratives were never my favorites though.By the way,Godhead is a single word,"was just that' was tiresome in last (paragraph?)verse.Nice try. RED
Edited on Jan 12, 7:03 p.m. because ''. -
This was certainly different. I loved the way you described the dream and analysed it. Very different perspective and amazing effort. Thank you for entering my contest.
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wow - this is such a different piece. i like the unique and creative quality to it. you really explain the dream well (excellent imagery) and i like how you went on to analyze it as well. just splendid. thank you for entering, and best of luck <33
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Again, another person who didn't quite read the rules, I wanted GOALS more than REM cycles but hell lets throw the rule book out the window. Not that the rule book was checked out by many in this contest. Hee hee. I really enjoyed this though. I loved how everything was so fearful, yet the whole time you seemed to have a calm, drop of hope the whole time. The analysis is amazing as well.
With a spell and a kiss I'm out like this
MAD -
Wow...thank you so much for entering my contest--this is truly a beautiful piece. I love the way you both explain the dream, and then continue to analyze it all in one poem...just beautiful...thanks again for sharing this.
~Ica~ -
Hello,
That poem was very imaginative. I liked it…but… “Read the rules more carefully, next time!”.... I know it's clear... but I must abide by the rules
Thanks for entering anyway. Keep on writing.
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WOW! AMAZINGLY WRITTEN!! JSUT BEAUTIFUL!!! KEEP IT UP!!!!! XOXO
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As usual your heart comes out in your poems and you knwo it has never been any other way when you are touched by something or you loved someone it shows. Your dreams are very mmuch like you are...different in society no one else can be who you are and i'm alwys admired that about you and your work choder.
SO PROUD.
luv,
JOAN OF STARK RAVING MAD -
Very good poem. Good luck in the contest. Take care Rick
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wow thats awsome i really like it very creative
naughty
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