i am a fixture
of dull and pretentious
yawning my life away
on the same old news
"another fuckin' lousy day"
and if that's not enough
i write about it in shades
of gray
and immortal decades
the special place
where feelings and time
were stunning
as the opening of a lost letter
and i'll read it
as the martyr
for a piece of brief
immortality
(fallen wings no longer
apply)
i listen to familiar songs
and the words blur
into a melody
of fear
yes
i loathe
familiar
real fear with real faces
with miserable beginnings
and ends
tossed aside
(the help-wanted
and obituaries)
just the Man
landing a swift kick
to my genitals
he
"stopped by for a quickie"
the world shakes
and
drips of life fall
from rusting pipes
yes
i am a fixture
and time
is running out
of your mouth
on the tip of my
(forked)
tongue
In a list
A contest entry
- Picture Inspired. by Naridill.
700 points, ended June 2, 2008, 5 entries
Gold trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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All the words convey most accurately the immense evil in gossip. I like, best, the lines time is running out of your mouth on the tip of my forked tongue.
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Holy cow, this takes an immediate ultimate trip to the core of the reader's being, regardless of their circumstance. You are ever economical, paring wording and phrasing to the essentials that light up the entrails and give the heart a needed jolt. Two roads may have diverged, but I think we are far from the yellow wood.


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Your work always inspires me. I wish you well in this contest, but know you don't need a trophy to be called Poet...
Love, Lane

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very strong poem. you really send a message. your description was appropriate and well thought through, nothing was useless, you did a great job communicating what you think about certain things. i like it when people voice their opinions and tell how they really feel, its about time people stopped beating around the bush, great write!


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HA! I love it! The whole overall tone of this one is to laid back yet in your face. Sort of like the devil conjuring self loathing as a form of solitude. I feel this, see it so clearly. A face slowly aging into a reality yet to go bust. This piece takes you places, I personally would not alter it and I've sat her drinking it in for awhile now. Yes, let me feel your finger nails snagging at the flesh of my temples. I couldn't love the shiver more
Brilliant!! The 2nd and 7th stanza were my faves in this, though I can say there is not one out of place, it reels my mind.


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Stunning work with such a vivid imagery on life. Written with such a finess. great job.
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Well a birdie told me to read this poem...cant say I was disappointed...nope not at all...good swift kick in the ass of reality is what I received...and bravo to the man who made me feel such...with his fabulous way of sharing his thoughts...
hey...I started thinking of allpoetry in this light..then I came to my senses...and see the reality of it all
love your blues man
Mal

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SIgh~
Muddy...your poetry is always so real....about life and filled with emotion...not pretty words perfectly placed and forced in even lines to imitate what some LIKE to call poetry....
Take a good look, all... this IS TRUE poetry...
Lynda


1 - 8 of 8







