the last hoorah
is taking place
right above my head
lie curled up
and rocking
in this old boat
waiting in want
for the last look
at the prisoner i love
feet fall on the ashen ground
some loose crumbs
fall down around me
as do my tears
when i hear the one two stomp
i push out just far enough
to catch the eyes
that heal me and steal me
away
our fingers mangled
into our symbol of love
as they all file past
into the unknown
prayers on the lips
that only days ago
pleased my lover
and now
quivering
realize love is fleeting
when i begin to paddle off
i sigh
for i know my lover will
take their place
in the heavens
and i will go on
with memories to warm me
and keep me
alive
Author notes
picture prompt: free verse
A contest entry
- PIF: the bridge of sighs by unraveled.
490 points, ended June 3, 2008, 6 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
-
I liked this. The images are great like "our fingers mangled into our symbol of love as they all file past into the unknown" I can tell punctuation isn't your style but some occasional commas would help the overall effect.
My only complaint is the ending- I was hoping for a really strong finish, instead it was a little cliche. Still, the rest of the poem is pretty well done.
Thanks for the entry,
-cassidy
-
Great write. You have been slacking though...lost your inspiration, wwriter's blaock, or just too damn busy....?
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