Once there was a little girl
who loved a little boy
who lived upon a golden hill
in a valley rich with joy.
The little girl was playing
in the grass at the park one day
when the little boy saw her laughter
and stole her heart away.
he carried her to his little house
upon the golden hill
and asked her if she'd stay with him
and the little girl said "I will."
So they played together,
for forever and a while
and they had such adventures
each second wreathed in smiles.
But when that time was over
and the little girl had grown
she told him she must leave him now
and journey on her own.
The boy's little heart was broken
but he quietly agreed
for he dearly loved the little girl
and she needed to be freed.
The little girl said, "I'll miss you boy,
but I must return home now
for I'm grown up, and you're still young
but I 'll come back somehow."
So the girl left the little boy
and his house on the golden hill
and he swore that he would wait for her
and he's waiting for her still.
A contest entry
- Rhyme and Flow part 2 Children's - 50,000 points series by cricketjeff.
4000 points, ended June 3, 2008, 39 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Fairytale It Up by HereComesTheSun.
525 points, ended July 6, 2008, 15 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Love Poems! by Peachy.
1400 points, ended July 20, 2008, 28 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Writes That Deserve A trophy by piccola.
600 points, ended August 9, 2008, 56 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Proudly Presenting: ROUND 1 by Walk-Free.
1000 points, ended August 31, 2008, 78 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 8 of 8
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aww!
this is such a cute poem... it told such a sad and heart-breaking tale! the beginning was so adorable... it was so sweet and innocent! but the ending lines just crushed me! keep penning, thanks for the wonderful entry!
~beauty of silence
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aaww
such innocence in these few lines. This almost reminded me of Jack and Jill.
The story is cute and I like how everything was built up and sadness was portrayed towards the end. a good contrast of emotions. congrats on the lovely trophies and good luck!
transit!!
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This is adorable. I'm happy to see that it placed in the contest.
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romantically cute poem
enjoyed every second while i was reading this.
loved the rhyme and the idea of a house on 'the golden hill'
thank you and best of luck
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Oooh this leaves me wondering what happens...if she eventually comes back or not This is very good. I smiled the whole way through Congratulations on your silver!
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this is a treasure and that's all I have to say about that!
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ohmygosh so amazing i love it and really want to know the story behind it great job :]
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Thank you for your entry in our children's contest for poetry, it was a very enjoyable read but we found that you have some slant rhyme...agreed and free to us do not rhyme, but overall a good poem.
Please join us in our future contests, we love to read your work...Sue and Jeff
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