the house is saturated
in sounds
paint, plaster and plywood
the cracked eyes you
held to so dearly
slowly melting with
every renovation
moons have cycled through
the closure of days
and yet i am still here
watching your memories glaze
i cannot join you in life
but am not ready to fade on
rest in death’s quiet nocturnes
where the dawn will never arrive
and i won’t let you forget
Author notes
Part IV in the series: http://allpoetry.com/list/53035-When-the-Nocturne-Quiets
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Comments
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oh man!!! LOVED THIS!
haunting , dark , sad...etc. etc.
and the last line...oh my it have me a real shiver!!!
LOVED it!!
~all my best!!!
~
S.P. 
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Hauntingly sad, especially (for me) that there will never be an aubade to couteract the nocturne.
Sparse language that draws painful images; I'm not sure if the house is a metaphor for love and will have to go and read the series.
The rhythm of the final line, the broken catch in the rhythm, is the most haunting part of the poem for me.
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A dark forboding dream, I will never let you forget. Wonderful lines. This poem has many images to it. Fine penning. ~Sie
. Rewarded 4
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wow this really spoke to me I absolutely loved it.
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Your poetry is haunting. Spooky and dark but in a very good way. This one reminds me of some dark forgotten memory. Perhaps I should read the rest of this series. Well done!
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Thanks; I try to give mine an ethereal feel if possible, so I'm glad you felt it was haunting.
That said, yeah, the rest of the series read from the beginning would probably help clear this up a little.
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I feel so behind... I really should pay more attention to that little box that holds the poetry by my favorites. I just now saw this. Isn't that sad?
Anyway, this was amazing. I don't really have anything else to say. It was just... "Wow." The kind of poem that leaves a person speechless and thinking.
Nice work.
Is there going to be a part five? -
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Don't feel bad; it's not uncommon for me to miss stuff written by those on my favorite's list. Even when I read 'em, I don't usually comment.
Anyway, thank you for yours.
And yeah, there probably will be a part five; it just doesn't feel done to me and it won't be until I'm satisfied with it. -
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I see. I generally always comment... Unless I am busy.
No prob.
Awesomeness. I look forward to reading it then. Yes, it did feel a little... Open-ended.
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long time no see. Prolly cause I haven't signed on to AIM lately. Anyhow, how was the concert? I hope it sweet. I'm going to go read the other parts of your series since this has me interested. Very nice Jas.
Khoury
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So, the concert kicked ass and my friend and I walked out with our ears numbed from all the noise.
It was fantastic.
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Well, the concert's tomorrow, but I'll let ya know when I get back, trust me. It should be pretty awesome.
How was your graduation? How's it feel to be free of high school?
Thank you; I hope you like the rest of it.
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