Arousing satiable sensations,
are gastronomic tongue twists,
of scarlet wine
and pungent cheese on yeasty bread.
Gently adored,
food breathes love inside the kitchen.
Earthen crockery beholds
apples and pears snapping to life,
slivered by well honed knives,
and doused with passion.
The onions shed tears,
plump tomatoes dribble down chins
as they are bitten by hungry cooks.
Slender nude bodies
swirl and mix as they bathe
and dress in creamy gowns
And scents descend like fallen stars,
the universal message
felt by the masses waiting
to be tempted.
Mouths drool in anticipation
of what the nose has tasted;
a party for your lips and buds,
an explosion of satisfaction.
Author notes
I have been watching cooking shows and have noticed how much the chefs love the food and handle it with care.
A contest entry
- Response to still life Allpoetry. Sponsored by Winklings. #90. by Lyndon.
6000 points, ended June 26, 2008, 14 entries
Bronze trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Please reread my poem. Somewhere along the way, while I was editing, the "are" got lost. (Those darned "are" thieves.) This from an honors English student in college!
As far as the vagueness in saying "slender nude bodies," I said that on purpose to titillate the readers to image as they will. This poem is about the senses isn't it?
Thanks for the read and the astute commentary.
~ Joyce
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I understand the importance
of most stanzas on an even footing, but not all details seem a response to the painting. Your first stanza poses as a sentence but it is not because there is no finite verb. 'Arousing' is a present participle.
The second stanza is adorably succinct. Slender nude bodies and the masses is all a bit hazy for this reader as I descend through the poem.
I must say that you do appeal to olfactory and taste senses in your images!
Best wishes. Lyndon of the Winklings.
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My feeling about food (ergo the picture) is sensual. I can envision all of this just looking at the picture. ~ J
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There is so much life in this poem and tactile sensation.
Your first stanza seems a bit off to me though, and mind you, it may just be me, but I am not quite getting a complete sentence here -
"Arousing satiable sensations,
gastronomic tongue twists,
scarlet wine,
pungent cheese on yeasty bread."
is it scarlet wine pungent cheese on yeasty bread that the tongue twists?
I think perhaps, the punctuation is off, or this reader . . .
but other than that, I was drooling with the rest in anticipation of what the nose had tasted.
So much wonderful word weaving, I could smell and taste it all as well.
Best of luck in the judging. ~Pamela
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Thanks for your suggestions. I have edited the first stanza and would appreciate it if you would look at it again. It is actually the foods that "twist" the tongue! I always appreciate everything you have to say. I trust your judgment. ~ Joyce
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Ahhhh, Much better. This is just gorgeous!
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I love this very original and entertaining write. I, too, watch cooking shows from time to time, and you have caught the essence here. Best to you in the contest!
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This poem emersed me in the mind set of the cook and the dinner party attending the meal. Very unique take on the prompt. Refreshingly different. I realy enjoyed readin this
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Thanks for the lovely words! Made my day. ~ Joyce
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What an awesome look at life as apples and pears of life are slivered and doused with passion. Our tears dribble down chins as bodies dress in gowns. The cooks scent leave the message to be tempted in what the nose has tasted gives a party to lips and our satisfaction. What a crockpot mixed together to become a stew. I find this compelling and complement the nature of the poem.
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You are so kind in your comments. I truly appreciate your careful reading. Thanks! Joyce
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A li'l bit abstract, a li'l bit of mixing of all senses and spices exposed on the table of your poetry. And ending is like a great invitation to sit next your table.
~Sonja~
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