As we sit here together
the dark night around us
with just a blanket around
our shoulders, we gaze up into space
With the faint fires of the stars
traveling through time
and the planets making rings
around our star, the sun
who's light is now gone
The wind whispers loudly
and brings the clouds across
our stage: the night sky
Feeling our disappointment
raindrops of sadness fall.
Now you are my star
my heat, my love.
All my memories of this night
are of you, sitting next to me
as the rain washes everything else
away, along with the night.
The sun that shines tomorrow
will find us still here:
waiting for another perfect night
alone.
Author notes
~ Planets, stars, blankets, fires, memories, together, space, rings, whispers, night, and raindrops.
Same as option five. Just a different set of words. (Brownie points for the use of all concepts.
and so i did . I reentered this contest because i hated my other poem. it was bugging me.
and that song is by 30 seconds to mars.
Nakatrea
A contest entry
- Options Contest by Simply Simple.
1000 points, ended June 7, 2008, 83 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Help? please. If there is any suggestion you want to make please do. I know this one needs a bit of guidance so ya....Kat.
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Ah..this is just a truth of the universal philosphy of the life and the love in it..you made this work very impressive my friend..well done...
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You did well with your word bank . This is quite lovely describing a night full of memories.
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I liked the other entry too.
But this was excellent. Great work my loverly twin.
Thanks for two such amazing entries.
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Beautiful write Kat. I love the imagery! The reader can almost get a sense of being there in that special moment. Best of luck in your contest.♥
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I like it Kat. Its really beautiful and painted a clear picture in my head of what you wrote
Well done!
Tam xxx
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i liked the poem, but the way u wrote it it just didnt seem 2 flow that well, but u did gud....Bella
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