Dear Cody...

Know me or not
close as brother n' sister but far from it
brother n' sister or perfect strangers,
take your pick.
knowing some, yet so little.
i'm your little sister trying for years,
to figure out who you are.
scared to talk to you, scared to admit it.
your little sister is scared of the world and the people in it.
scared to be judged, judging to not be.
trying to fit in, only to fail.
music is my true love.
hid in my room, lock my door.
can't get hurt when your alone.
trying to see what i did wrong.
only to sit and think i'll never be good enough.
your sister can't say anythign good about herself.
always changing herself, never happy with who she is,
wanting to be so much more.
trying to be perfect, but never making it.
looking at the pretty girls in their skinny jeans and boys all around,
wishing for a day i could be them,
to know whats it like to be beautiful.
type of girl to wear black,
but love bright colors,
funky patterns,
things that scream here i am.
poka dots complete me.
strips are my soul.
hearts fill my needs and wants.
going to shows covered in black,
mosh pit lover and music junkie.
she'll search for you, but knowing your not there.
knowing you through your friends.
she'll do anything to know you.
taking every art class she can,
just wanting to be like her big brother.
she'll spill her heart into tons of notebooks,
page after page of poems about life.
wanting to know so much, but never asking.
she'll leave you with a poem, just something more to add to her collection.
writing it, but never sending it.
turning up the country,
putting on offical FFA dress,
just to leave as the redneck gril,
who lost hope in knowing you.
time after time, letting a moment with you slip on by.
watnting to know you, but finally realizing there is no time.