They were the darkest woods ever.
At least that I had ever seen.
Trees with leaves almost of leather.
Animals that struck me as too lean.
So I quickened up my rigid stride.
While my eyes scanned for some light.
If I had a horse, full speed I'd ride.
If my lungs were not so tight.
I never should have dared to trespass.
God damn shortcuts are always wrong.
Where is my boyscout with his compass?
Why is this taking so frightfully long?
Wait, is that a light that I see up ahead?
No, just the moon climbing higher instead.
Author notes
An American Sonnet about the night
Written December 24th, 2003
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1 - 14 of 14
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That was a very nicely written poem
with an excellent rhyme and choice of words..
Keep on writing (I know it is late but congrats on the gold trophy)
Nooni -
very nice job on this poem!! and yes, it is a very deserving gold trophy winner.
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A well deserving gold trophy winner written here.
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This piece was very well composed. it flowed very well and the images were quite stark upon the pages. I thought the part witht he boyscout was a bit too abstract but besides this, I enjoyed the read. Thanks so much for entering!
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Very well written. I like how you put this poem together. It could be a great story. You gave a wonderful visual, not many poems can do that. You have an excellent talent. Thank you so much for entering my first contest. And the very best of luck to you.
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Pretty cool poem...sounds to me like a dark place in someone's mind that they are having trouble getting out of.
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Very good atmosphere created within your words and some vivid images here. I for one have never tried a sonnet, but I do believe that a good poet should be able too, lol - you've done that very well! Very classical feel about this poem which I admire very much!
~ Nicolette
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You do that! Don't forget to wear your ASSHAT.
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Ooh - a looser form - I'm gonna tell...
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Oh, wow, thanks, sorry about being snappy, I just hate know it all kids that say they don't care, when they do, not you, these other two I was speaking to earlier. this is an American Sonnet, a looser form of the classical english sonnets, something I kind of invented. In between an abuade and a sonnet.
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Horus8,
Very vivid in your imagery, you show a prowess for being able to pull the reader in and allowing them to see your work instead of actually reading it. Beautifully rendered, especially considering you are able to convey so much in so few lines. I must thank you for catenating this piece.
Alimae -
you really do classics so beautifully. it pisses me off but i'm getting used to it.
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hmmm this is a good poem
I liked the words you used to express yourself
good job an good luck
~Jen~ -
Wait a minute...I think its actually a house made out of gingerbread...you might want to check it out!!! Great write, it put me out there in the woods...since it is winter I started to get cold!!! CURSES I hate being cold...but a good poem sinced it evoked such a response...I suggest shoring up the meter a bit, aside from that you have yourself a winner!!!
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