I cannot seem to put into words,
just how you make me feel.
But try with all my might,
will I tell it all to you?
That fateful night we met,
I wasn't looking for real love.
Maybe someone to chat with,
for an hour, and maybe more, thats all i could hope for.
You gave me so much more,
you showed me a glimpse of true love.
Somehow you got closer to my heart,
than anyone has ever ventured to go.
"Call me and you won't regret"
is exactly what you said to me.
I'm not sure how you captured my attention,
but for some reason I couldn't resist the call.
On so many levels, you and I relate,
it's crazy how wonderful you make me feel.
You poured out your life's ups and falls unto me,
like precious raindrops in a desert, I caught them all.
These are things people search for, for years,
trial and error, many learning experiences.
For us, it didn't take but a few hours,
for everything clicked in place, in just one night.
Author notes
I wrote this for my honey but haven't let him see it yet...help me out.
In a list
A contest entry
- Prewrites? Sure! by xCandieKissesx.
300 points, ended August 29, 2008, 41 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - for my favorites only---ok now its for everyone by Shelby K.
800 points, ended August 26, 78 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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hi this is very good,nice rhythm, and flow and beautiful words Ithink whoever you wrote it for will love it littlefishone
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Very strong, very well written and fully conceived. I don't think you need a rewrite. I would be honored to receive such a strong, heartfelt work from my love.
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I LOVE THIS!!!
I can totally relate to this. I felt the EXACT same way when I met my boyfriend Travis. It is so funny how lame "boyfriend" sounds. He is so much more. He is my love, my life, my everything. He makes everything so much better and yet he can make it so much worse. And I def. was not looking for anything when I meant it. Crazy how life works. lol
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It's pieces like this that make me read it through, nod, and smile at the same time with recognition.
You've captured the emotion really well, and it seems to be a piece many people can relate too...which I think is a good thing really!
Well done, good work.
=]
xx -
"Call me and you won't regret"
is exactly what you said to me.
I'm not sure how you captured my attention,
but for some reason I couldn't resist the call.
Ah yes, these words definately remind me of several times I've expierienced. Great job and good luck!
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outstanding!!!
I have to let my fiance read this. It will throw her head back a few feet. It is not exactly how things happened with us, but the feeling is the same. Wonderful
thank you.
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BEAUTIFUL!!!!
Wow you have captured
my heart with this peice
This reminds me of myself and
someone i know expecially the lines
"On so many levels, you and I relate,
it's crazy how wonderful you make me feel."
because we do relate alot to one another
and we think alot alike.
As i was reading this i so had him on mind.
Well done my friend.
Keep it up.
And i say you should let your honey read this.
I'm sure he will be very flattered and speechless
none the less this was very heartfelt.
-Mandi
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GRAND!
I love the emotions in this piece. It has feeling, emotion, and it also tells a wonderful story of how you can fall in love at first sight without even knowing it is going to happen. I love it. It is truly a wonderful read. Your honey is a lucky man to have such a sweet, sentimental, and well written woman. ~mandie~ -
I really liked the second to last stanza! I'm not sure why you wanted any advice with this at all, it's really heartfelt and wonderfully written at the same time. I loved how you didn't rhyme and still had such a good flow. =)
GREAT job
diggin it majorly
My "expert
" advice: Be Proud of this
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That guy is really lucky and should be happy to have this from you
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Awww, thats so sweet!!
really beautiful Chrissy, amazing work ^-^
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this is really good, but it seems like it wanders off in bits of it, but it comes back together which is really good.
good write,
keep it up
~*~KiRsT~*~
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Lovely
Wow this was really good. I think tht you did an awesome job with puttin this together.
These are things people search for, for years,
trial and error, many learning experiences.
For us, it didn't take but a few hours,
for everything clicked in place, in just one night.
This is a wonderful way to end such a wonderful poem.
I know that he will love this. I sure do!
Thank you for sharing this with me.
It was amazing.
Have a great day.
God Bless.
Good luck
~Only1love4ever -
aaaaaaaaaaaaw did you lt your honey read this is was nice of you to write this it was a great piece thanks for sharing
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whoa he's one special guy
good job it flows beautiful I can just picture it!
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Honey that means alot coming from you. THanks.
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