I.
Your hands were always covered in car
grease and oil. You were afraid to touch
me because you didn't want to get me
dirty. My pale bony fingers grasped
your black-stained hands. Your blue
eyes widened and your pupils dilated
when I told you that I didn't care;
as long as you're holding me.
II.
I bought us matching glow bracelets;
everyone knew we were together.
The lights shone brightly on stage
yet I could still see the tint of
purple in the audience. Later I laid
my head upon your lap and watched
the sky fill with stars while the
auditorium emptied. You held my shivering
hand until we got to your car. You opened
the passenger door for me and led me
in gently.
III.
Going over 50 miles past the speed
limit, we arrived at my house
within three minutes. I embraced
your warm torso one more time,
kissed your gaunt cheek and slammed
the car door. Darling, if I know that
would change our relationship the way
it did, I could have walked my 3 miles.
IV.
I spent the next week at Starbucks
every afternoon. I let the scent of
ground coffee beans intoxicate my
senses while I wrote down choppy
poems on half-used napkins. I
wrote you letters
[ones you'll never read]
saying I give up and every time
I text you, I'm putting myself
in a battle with no weapons.
V.
The smell of gasoline reminds me
of you and late night joy rides.
Every time I see the colour black,
I flash back to every time our hands
joined. Coffee beans are just another
way of saying that I still think of you.
[I'm not hopelessly in love;
I'm hopelessly attached.]
Author notes
He loves cars.
He came to my dance recital.
He drove me home.
He abandoned me.
And honestly,
I'm not sure I care anymore.
♥
Find me. Fuck Me. Forget me.
Comments
1 - 28 of 28
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One more tragic love story...the old sayings true..."love them than leave them" it can go both ways!!
You got the right ideal...don't care anymore and move on!!
Thanks for entering
darlintlc
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I smell gasoline and motor oil so you've done something right. thank you for entering
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I really love this and I feel like I can relate so much. I adore the way that you write. I can feel the pain and see the beauty in your words.
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Oh and, don't forget your dedication to Kerri in your author's notes.
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Oh yes, thank you.
It's fixed now :]
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Wow...this was...incredibly, touching? I think that is the word. Reading through the beginning I had this adorable sense of calm, happy, and puppy love. But when I got further, it seemed almost like you were losing yourself, in your longing.
Incredibly sad, but very strong. It grasped my consciousness and I for some reason could not pull away. It broke my heart, because in some ways we all experience pain in heartbreak, but you let yours fall out like a piece of paper ripped in half, representing your heart in a way that is anything but clique.
I actually can say I adored this. Very strong, and it told a painful story.
♥♥♥
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i agree with aanika... this is one of your best i love it
its beautiful in it's sad heartbreaking way (which i love haha)
wow like wow.
i love how you wrote about so many colors in the first 2 stanzas and i love the 4th stanza. it's sooo sad and wonderfully written
you write brilliantly
i love your poems!!
xox. Emma -
I've read all of your poems
& this is my favourite.
I don't know if it's because I can relate
or because the imagery is so beautiful,
but seriously,
this hit me in the heart like I haven't been hit in a long time.
<3 -
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Aw thank you ♥
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Great!
Ohh...this is so sad. It made me feel like I was there with you. Great write!
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wow, this was amazing. such emotion. my favorite lines were
"I text you, I'm putting myself
in a battle with no weapons."
~and~
"[I'm not hopelessly in love;
I'm hopelessly attached.]" -
It’s adorable that he didn’t want to get something so pretty, dirty. It’s more adorable that you didn’t care. Matching glow bracelets, sweet! :]
Aw, creative writing or reality, this is sad :[ I know letter writing can be a great way to get out unwanted emotions but maybe you should send some of the letters to him; letting him know how you really feel. Aw, so pretty much everything reminds you of him? That blows, like big time :[ I’m sorry that the smell of Coffee reminds you of him and that the colour black is a constant reminder of your hands intertwining; consisting of some sort of intimacy.
I hope you know that you can come and talk to me about absolutely anything and it'll stay between us <3 -
WOW!!!
I think I started to tear up....seriously WOW!!!
I love it! XD
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Okay.
If you want the truth, it was very hard to read this. Every line reminded me of Brent and...idk, it was just hard. But its so touching and beautiful. I love you baby. So much.
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this is wonderful. and getting your heart broken is horrible. you wrote about it nicely though. great write.
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This is beautiful... It reminds me of when my own heart was broken, and I will be the first to agree that it isn't fun. Reading your poem, all of those memories came flooding back to me, and I came close to tears a few times...
I will attest that the rape of one's soul is perhaps the most lethal, and however hard heartache is, it's sometimes what it takes to show us what we're really made of. Things will look up, trust me.
I will be here if you ever need to talk to someone who understands.
♥
Laura x
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"IV.
I spent the next week at Starbucks
every afternoon. I let the scent of
ground coffee beans intoxicate my
senses while I wrote down choppy
poems on half-used napkins. I
wrote you letters
[ones you'll never read]
saying I give up and every time
I text to, I'm putting myself
in a battle with no weapons."
this was my favorite.
you are so beautiful and amazing.
and guys are such assholes.
let's go gay, ay?!
yesss.
♥
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let's go baby <3
I'm on AIM,
where are you?
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Stunning piece! You deffinately did a great job, BUT I don't doubt in your talent
I love love love it.
Keep up the great work
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Love is a mystery I've only began to discover in poetry. When I begin to know what it is, life takes a change for the worse and I forget and have to start over.
I was impressed with you before I read your poetry. Lets just say I'm impressed even more and hope I can change your mind about this topic
--Tim
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Welcome to Allpoetry.. I see you already have a good deal of poems here and readers too within a few days of your arrival good. Hope u enjoy the site.
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very sad poem but very nicely written i liked the personal effect too
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You blue
eyes widened and your pupils
its 'Your' blue eyes hun
anyway..
where did he go!??
im sorry.. boys are stinky and he should have never touched you.. thats where it all ends and begins.. dont let them touch you unless you know for sure its gonna last.
ily bby <3 keep that chin up
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First: I love this! <3
Second: You wrote "You blue
eyes widened and your pupils dilated
when I told you that I didn't care;
as long as you're holding me." But it should be "Your blue eyes ... ect." Not "You blue eyes, Ect." [:
Back to the love
I don't know but I am really loven the way you wrote this and how the emotion just kind of flows. May favorite part would probably be
"I spent the next week at Starbucks
every afternoon. I let the scent of
ground coffee beans intoxicate my
senses while I wrote down choppy
poems on half-used napkins. I
wrote you letters
[ones you'll never read]"
But I also love this one
"Darling, if I know that
would change our relationship the way
it did, I could have walked my 3 miles."
I think the best thing you wrote, was left out
And put into the Athurs Note :]
"He loves cars.
He came to my dance recital.
He drove me home.
He abandoned me.
And honestly,
I'm not sure I care anymore."
Keep it up babe!
I think your Muse might becoming home
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Ohh honey this is adorable.. it's sad in a way though... it almost made me shed a tear..the last stanza was really sweet...and being hopelessy attached is just as sad as being hopelessy in love
Good job love. -
wow. honestly, just wow. the intensity of the emotion was just raw.
"I let the scent of
ground coffee beans intoxicate my
senses while I wrote down choppy
poems on half-used napkins. I
wrote you letters
[ones you'll never read]
saying I give up and every time
I text to, I'm putting myself
in a battle with no weapons." --this was my favorite stanza. it was soo...gah! amazing. especially 'i'm putting myself in a battle with no weapons.". that line really got me.
and i'm sorry this happened and you had to go through each day thinking about it. you should know, you're not alone! although the situations may differ, the outcome is the same. we're newer friends so i know you probably won't take that to heart as much as you should, but know that it's 100% true. and that i'm here if you need to talk about it,or talk about forgetting it.
♥
keep writing the words your heart tells you to.
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“I bought us matching glow bracelets;
everyone knew we were together.
The lights shone brightly on stage
yet I could still see the tint of
purple in the audience.”
I really loved that part. Brought back memories for me.
As strange as this may be, seeing as how we aren’t really friends or anything, I do look at your poetry. And I have to say that this is the best thing I’ve seen you put up. Not to say that your other works are bad, because they aren’t. This is simply more…raw.
It has a nice pretty flow and uses simple, straight forward words. It’s like a memory in itself. You can tell that you’re reminiscing as you write it. I like how it doesn’t sound forced or over thought. You just sort of laid all your thoughts out there and it gave the poem a wonderful effect.
Now, I don’t have to know you to know that it’s a lie to say that you don’t care. You wouldn’t have written this if you didn’t care. That’s part of the reason why this particular poem is so good. Pain, of any kind, is always beautiful when written. It makes for a good emotion to write because every reader can relate to it because everyone has felt it in one way or the other.
And the bitter sort of pain that is displayed here is beautiful, well written, and touching.
Amazing.
Keep writing your heart out.
~Megan
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I really liked this. lots.
I think everyone gets attatched to someone at some point and is hurt by that.
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