Wrapped in Alpine coat
like debutante upon the slopes,
they wait within eucalyptus trees,
eyes glower: black pebble flowers,
attracting coos from U.S. fools.
Fluffy, fur lined mincing machines,
with vampirism tendencies,
and a smile that Dracula wishes to own.
Lolling like a satisfied cat,
until curiosity overcomes initial shock
and some rare state-side meat:
finger sized portions, become aperitifs,
or if the unsuspecting should walk below
the bough upon which they lie and wait,
then mega-dollar bouffant hair
won’t stop their claws as they penetrate.
For some strange reason, as yet unknown,
these defiant cousins of cuddlier kin,
seem to deviate; unnaturally relate,
to the southern state of Texas flesh,
which the rend and tear, without care
to reputation of Aussies national bear.
So remember all you Sepos,
as you idle in shade by billabong shore
that dropbears linger like decorations,
just waiting ‘till they hear that twang
of twisted English that you bring.
(Oh, if you really think its serious;
just shows; you’ll believe anything)
Author notes
Dropbear - A meat eating relative of the Koala that seems to have a particular liking to USA people; http://www.geocities.com/muirnin/db.htm
Sepos - Shortened Aussie rhyming slang - "Septic Tank = Yank"
In case some people don't get this, it is satire based on a story that was populated by Australian people that a relative of the koala was a meat eating animal that had grown fond of the taste of USA people, the myth grew to become national news in Australia, it started to effect the holiday business until it was declared a hoax.
I decided on this as my entry because to me is shows the typical humour of the Australian people (& how easily some Americans can be fooled)
A contest entry
- Tour De Monde - Stage 1 by Errant Panther.
300 points, ended June 5, 2008, 13 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Critique Requested
Comments
-
Brother of mine...
you are too much!! 
An excellent rip of humor!
Love this..lol
Jazzy
*I am the one with Lynda sneaking off stage left too*
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lmao cute little koalas???
Yeah I have to admit that some of us can be gullable
LOL omg I needed that laugh...
This is unique and amazing, kinda like you, Bro
(Okay, after reading this, I will just sneak quietly out stage left of the competition unnoticed now)
Lynda
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The poem was very humorous,thanks for entering you cheeky pommie you. Made me laugh 'til I had a stitch.
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