Shattered, Dark, Lonely, Cold:
How more can I describe my soul?
I long to feel your warming essence;
I'm left to wither without your presence.
You were the one that housed my spirit;
But now I cry, can no one hear it?
The love you offered is ill replaced,
What's left of you has laid to waste.
I scream aloud in fits of sorrow
Wishing that I'll be gone tomorrow,
For my pitiful life has lost its meaning;
The depths of Hell I'm now careening.
Author notes
My name is Zach and I like Pickle Cheezeballz
A contest entry
- Write Your Heart Out by stargazer91.
300 points, ended May 19, 12 entries
Silver trophy winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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This is really good. I don't quite see the rhyme in the first two lines, but it's written extremely well, despite that.
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I like it alot. My favourit part is the last stansa......" I scream aloud in fits of sorrow, Wishing that I'll be gone tomorrow, For my pitiful life has lost its meaning; The depths of Hell I'm now careening." That part i like that the best..nice job =)
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Wow. I love this. The rhyme and the rhythm fit so well together!!! Awesome write. Thanks for entering it into my contest. you did a great job. Good luck!!!
(and I'm glad that I'm not the only one that likes pickle cheezballz... Got kinda scared there
)
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you capture the aching emptiness of being alone quite well,
the waste of one sided love, the sorrow of love unrequitted, it holds the ingrdients well...Artis
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