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Enough is Enough

Tonight you moved in my center;

Did I know you won't survive? Hold

on my love through darkness venter.

now enough is enough don't cry.

 

Hurts not to be with you today,

where these shroud restraint fell astray.

Hey little one mommy must die,

now enough is enough don’t cry.

 

As my breath upon breath convey,

this despair all too soon dismay,

abortion's arm; to be denied,

now enough is enough don’t cry.

 

Unbidden dreams slowly ascend,

like the reeds waving as they bend,

while hearing an utter breeze sigh,

now enough is enough don’t cry.

Author notes

Kendhal22
My prompt: enough is enough
Kyrielle:The Kyrielle was once a very popular French form and dates from the Middle Ages.
It is a simple form written in quatrains (four lines of poetry) and it includes a refrain (repeat line, phrase, or word.
As is normal with French poetry it is syllabic, (usually eight syllables and is so in this case).
Accordingly we end up with quatrains rhyming like this a.a.b.B.. c.c.b.B etc and each quatrain finishing with the same line, phrase or word.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

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Comments

1 - 12 of 12

  • amaranthine lover gold member
    July 1, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    leaves much to the imagination to sort through and ponder upon


  • PrabhuDayal Khattar silver member
    May 31, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    A wonderful and heartfelt sketch of the life is shown here in the verse..I love its impact and its approach..truely an honest sentiment from the heart itself..

    • kendhal22
      May 31, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      thank u

      thank u for the wonderful comments given to my poem and I'm glad u enjoyed too. Kendhal22

  • Sestos
    May 20, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    The syllabic meter works well to balance the line. However, you have a convulted syntax by trying to fit the rhythm.

    Examples would be:

    As my breath upon breath convey,

    Hurts not to be with you today,
    where these shroud restraint fell astray.

    Found this to be pretty nice:

    Hold
    on my love through darkness venter.

    Thanks for the read.

    • kendhal22
      May 20, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      thank u

      thank u for the comments and glad u liked. Kendhal22


  • Blooming Poet
    May 19, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    In some ways I like this poem a lot, but on others I do not, brings up some bad memories. so i give it a 92%

    • kendhal22
      May 19, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      thank u

      this was bad memory for me as well, but tend to write on my life experinces. hoped u like it as well. Sorry if u went through the same experince. Kendhal22

  • kendhal22
    May 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    thank u

    thank u for the 90% per cent. Even though the mess came through about the two perticipants in ur contest. thank u again. Kendhal22


  • warrior-eagle
    May 19, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    I say 90%


  • AusStar
    May 18, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    What a beautiful poetic form it is, It really appealed to me. Everytime I read 'enough is enough don't cry' I felt like I wanted to gasp! It is a beautiful poem, very powerful in its poetic form.

    • kendhal22
      May 18, 2008
      Edit | Reply

      thank u

      thank u for the wonderful comments and the applaudes given to my poem. Kendhal22

1 - 12 of 12