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friction

 
 
 
 
 
they held their secrets
intimate,
poised between wheel and carriage,
self and other
 
and each hour ripped
vacant necessities
from the blood of old earth,

 

from tar.
 

 

spikes warped until tracks
realigned at night:  a perilous siege

of rivets hammered deep.
 
 
by morning he was forged
 
 
anew,
 
like so many little boys,
an unwrapped train.
 
 
 
 
she was simply coal ... dreaming
of diamonds.
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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A contest entry

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Comments

1 - 5 of 5

  • Rowan gold member
    May 25

    Edit | Reply
    a diamond in the rough...
    but not rough.
    I loved this metaphor, and how you used the prompt. Boys, and an unwrapped train... loved that. Thanks hon for entering my contest.


  • transcendental baby gold member
    May 17

    Edit | Reply
    I love your metaphors ... they always cut straight to the feeling itself


  • ardentMarch gold member
    May 16

    Edit | Reply
    "she was simply coal ... dreaming
    of diamonds."

    I am still learning this whole metaphor thing..lol...that's why I use so much personification in my poems..lol

    I think I need to read you more often...you write with metaphor so well


  • Suzanne Dia gold member
    May 16

    Edit | Reply


    Nicely done, Kate.

    The images here are hard, as they should be, I think. The wheels... actually, you make me think of rending with this. Or .. the way people were tied between two carriages and then pulled apart. Perhaps I have too vivid an imagination, but that is what it makes me think of.

    She is already a diamond, I think maybe she just hasn't learned to see her own Shine yet.





1 - 5 of 5