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At A Hotel Room In Royal Oak

Sleeping the day away
upside down on the couch.
A mailslot in the door opened,
With a box of light, indiscriminately.
A set of eyes.
The voice.
"You got your rent?"
Silently,
I put my pants on,
and let the question
answer itself.

Author notes


Written December 22nd, 2003

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Comments

1 - 7 of 7

  • DeAnges
    April 29, 2005
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    I love the simplicity of the piece. It's great that you can take such a mundane moment in time and turn it into something interesting. Great job and good luck in the contest.


  • glazecovered
    April 10, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    Nice...very nice... you made the best of free-verse...I enjoyed this one. It leaves you hanging, thought-provoking, all I was looking for in this contest. Thank you for entering and good luck.
    ~Anastasia

  • arden
    January 15, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    *raised eyebrow*
    hmm, i am pondering what would become of me if mi land lord caught sight of that....
    lol
    how red did ye turn??? damn, must remember to tape that slot shut.

    arden

  • Breeze
    January 1, 2004
    Edit | Reply
    thats crazy i like it


  • B2oH
    December 31, 2003
    Edit | Reply

    Lovely

    Ooooh...lovely snapshot of a brief slice of time. The free-form verse works nicely here.

    Thanks for sharing

  • Redeemed
    December 23, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Very good poem! Kinda leaves ya hangin though. Overall very very good job. Keep writing. I like your work.

  • fallen-angels
    December 21, 2003
    Edit | Reply
    Lol. Very nice. I don't know what the answer is, my mind can take it a lot of ways. But cool, very cool. I like the style of it.

1 - 7 of 7