Vibrations hum,
scattering the hive
amongst armies of flowers
displaying yellows, reds, violets, pinks-
ethereal melody
sweeping through
this blooming city
of petals and bees,
music of nature's harmonious belief.
Author notes
30 words - Symphonic Garden
A contest entry
- Bear's PIF by Arkbear.
400 points, ended May 17, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Give me a critical thought.
Comments
1 - 9 of 9
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PS
I'd go with "amongst" myself. -
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thanks for the heads up. yeah, I wish the bees would revitalize... I see them sometimes in the mountains here... away from people. thanks for the feedback. Cheers
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So you still have bees?
I haven't seen a honeybee in years. They tell me that honeybees are disappearing due to a parasite that kills them, and cell phones, which supposedly mess up their "radar" so they can't go home again.
Anyway, that aside, this is a very good poem.
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Hi there :)
Lovey write :)
I think you meant...*amongst*...3rd line?
You have brought a very pretty picture to my mind with your chosen words ~
Very pretty indeed :)
Good luck to you and your entry,
God bless,
Bear ~
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No, thank you. Your contests are always so imaginative and with such beautiful entries in each one. Keep 'em coming and I will keep on writing. Cheers.
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Best wishes in the contest!
Write on!
*PEACE*
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thank you much. and congrats on the silver.
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I like the imagery in this.
It's a short piece, but
you can feel yourself in the garden.
With the sights and the sounds...
Great!
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thank you for the comment- and for stopping by again.
I need to get one more often and return the favor to your wonderful poetry as well.
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