Naked you
heat the sheets
as if your love
were summer
or the sun.
In that sun
you blossom on my lips
a rose, red petaled
deeper than the day
and coppered like
afternoon light.
Clutched tight
and flowing we
grow together
arched boughs
entwined in
our roots.
Curled close
in that space we
lie together only
a heartbeat apart.
A contest entry
- the language of intercourse and outercourse by Nicolette.
4500 points, ended June 1, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 6 of 6
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Oh wow! *sigh* This is amazing Garrison! Such a profound and wonderfully touching piece of thought penned within these lines. The imagery, flow, and presence express true beauty of love. Nicely done!


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This is a lovely piece of writing and I too liked the nature references – well done.
I too was wondering about “petaled” versus “pedaled” as my co-judge had already pointed out to you. I liked the softness of this piece – it has a glow about it, yet it also captures the intensity of lovemaking. I think it adheres to the contest requirements very well, Garrison. Nice work here.
Thank you for the entry.
~ Nicolette


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a very sweet and gentle piece. we always love nature references.
however, did you actually mean 'pedaled' rather than 'petaled'?
cuz if you did, it really gives the line an unexpected and fun twist. lolol
thanks for entering


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this is so beautiful - stanza two..amazing imagery & color! I definately feel both inner & outer courses while reading this...best of luck in the contest


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Takes my breath away. Gentle and beautiful beyond words. True intimacy. Deep as the oceans. Millions of applause Garrison, masterpiece!!!


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wow this is really good, subtle yet very sensual


1 - 6 of 6






