Wait up;
You moved forward
without me....
A contest entry
- 7/15 Quickie. by Merry Christmas.
425 points, ended May 15, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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this sounds familiar, as I had someone move forward without me, leading to the one I wrote. I might have had a little more emotion if you would have used an exclamation mark instead of the semi colon after wait up. it would make it feel like you were calling out to them in desperation. but I think it is quite good.
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Quite honestly I don't feel the emotion in this piece but it doesn't mean it's not a good poem, it is a good poem. In fact I quite like it. Well done.
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Very nice take on the prompt ~ best of luck in contest
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