The monarch stretches her dusty wings
a sun spatter falling on dust.
she breathes inhaling the light,
gaining day’s early trust.
The wind lifts
up she soars
adrift
Author notes
Duette- Form A .
A contest entry
- Write A Duette - LAST WEEK! Readers are required! by CookieZeal.
975 points, ended May 16, 10 entries
Honorable winner
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
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Did you know that you were an Honorable Mention, but the system couldn't credit you since you pulled it out of the contest? Is this a tech mistake? If not, please let me know.
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This is very beautiful, nothing more lovely than watching a monarch in sublime light. I don't think this requires further interpretation,
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Wonderful duette! I love the frame you chose for the subject matter. This hasn't the amount of ambiguity that I personally prefer but content and language well executed!
*Suggestion*
Were this mine, I'd let it 'lift' a little more to the air by deleting as much punctuation as possible. If/should you edit let me know by sending me a message to this commentary (not by IM due to anonymity)
. Do this before the weekend. Thank you so much for giving us a very very interesting piece.
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