You come here now in curiosity,
You're listening yet you are unaware,
of my deceiving personality
You're blind to consequences I must bear.
With vile moments venting my concerns
of conscience, which to God I now succumb.
My anguished heart still cries to you and yearns
for your acceptance, now my time is come.
I pray, sigh not with disappointed air,
as lifeless leaves of loveless autumn yield,
so falls my open heart to those who care,
like wind-swept seed onto an empty field.
Dear friends – I hope you are; I beg...I call!
I need you, though I had no need before.
Though arrogant, sometimes from grace I fall,
Illusions gone, I should be servitor,
not proud of moments in my anguished hell.
Come close and hear me, watch my lips, my pain
of body, mind and heart, with truths to tell
the darkness of my final, shamed disdain.
You heard her soft footfall in happy sound,
red roses clutched with loving faith so blessed,
a beauty, giving life, a trust, strong bound
in love, to always fill the saddest breast.
Yes, all men love, as I loved her. I gave
passion, perhaps too soon. I tell you true -
as God saw; threw aside my sin, to save
me, and forgave; as now I ask of you.
My infidelity did sometimes stray.
Then, foul Death heard dark night’s suspicious cries.
It does not matter! She is gone away
in silent shadows; cruellest sad demise.
I grieve the guilt of needless tragedy.
I wait; is there an honoured legacy?
You are the trusted friends I now implore.
Do not dissent! Revere my final breath,
not drift away through doubting, darkened door,
to leave me crying loud in lonely death.
Author notes
After reading Robert Browning's MY LAST DUCHESS and THE BISHOP ORDERS HIS TOMB, I wrote this poem. The man in the poem talks to those gathered around his death bed.
I am not sure of all grammar, so I am grateful if you make any comments to help me with it in this poem.
In a list
A contest entry
- Celebrating Robert Browning in rhyme. by ecrivain01.
450 points, ended May 20, 2008, 10 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 11 of 11
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Very interesting write
It held me all the way and kept we wondering how it was to follow through .Vey well written poem here . I am not sure on the spellings on a few words you might click spelling check just to make sure Ok
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I really did enjoy this piece not just because of the important message that you represented, but also because of the beautiful way you went about it. The stanzas that were written held deep signifigance and beauty whether from "her soft footfalls" to "my anguished heart still cries for you." Rhyme worked well for this piece, and I don't say that alot. But it worked extremely well, and was beautiful.
This is definitely going on my favorites list, as the beauty for this piece is simply unbearable and awe-inspiring.
Adsaige
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this is good, i could feel the emotion of this guy dripping of the page, a verry sad poem, but i much enjoyed it
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You stopped by one of my poems and left a nice comment so I thought I’d stop by your house and read your work. I’m glad I did, I really enjoyed this. Your style or “poetic voice” is wonderful. It’s clear decisive and depicts a vivid image in a wonderful rhymed verse. You have also woven an image of regret showing that you are very adept at penning emotion and you use that as a tool to keep your reader’s attention.
Love,
Amera
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thank you, Amera
Your critique is uplifting and helpful. This is my first attempt at this type of poem, so I am pleased with your response.
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A very deep and emotional poem. There is a tone of wistfulness and regret for love that has been betrayed and wasted along the way. There is also a profound humility now gained, through recognition of ones frailties and need for others, as life ebbs during darker hours.
'Dear friends – I hope you are! I beg! I call!
I need you, though I had no need before.
Though arrogant, sometimes from grace I fall,
Illusions gone, I should be servitor'
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thank you, frownsnfreckles
I appreciate your insight and your clear grasp of the meaning of my poem. You have made my day with your comment.
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I love the aroma this poem leaves behind, as if one could reach out and just touch it. This is good poetry for sure. You've given me more insight into Robert Browning's Work, thanks. Elizabeth Browning is one of my favorite Poetesses.
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thank you 2lullabyhaven
I appreciate your kind words and the time to read through my poem. I to like Elizabeth Browning. God bless.
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Excellent poem and think that it is very Browning-like in both theme and metre. Great lines that I am going to reread again and again! Good luck in the contest!
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This reminds me ...
more of "The Reverend Mr. Black", than it does of Browning, but that's simply because of the last stanza. Actually, I see no grammatical or spelling errors.
All in all, this is a remarkably good job.
Thanks for entering.
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