Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read Contests Groups Learn Forums Store Help
 

Goodbyes



Tears begin to form
upon her shimmering eyes
Rolling gently to the edge
trembling before she cries
Emotions flow so deep
within her winded sighs
Born of our recent goodbyes  








Author notes

7- lines

A contest entry

Fire flies in the garden

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression? Line numbers
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?) (Line numbers)

Comments

  • I like this and all seems to flow except the last line. I've read it over and over not sure what would make it do so. Several things do pop in to my mind just not sure which is best. anyway I love it

  • I liked this, I liked the fact you made it work with rhyme. The last line doesn't seem like the last line though, as if the poem is incomplete

  • Synonymous
    May 13
    Edit | Reply
    nice flow of rhyming words...
    Nicely done
    good luck