softly exhaled in
whispered moans
"I love you, Margaret"
the look in your eyes as you threw
your head back and sighed
"show me your passion"
wanting and longing cloaked
in the soothing tenderness
of our words
wafting over us
like an exotic
incense cloud
our desire tangible
in lustful yearnings
gently tempered
fingertips aching with
the need to touch you
to memorize
to know for an instant
the feel of your skin
roughness against smooth
tickling body hair
your name flowing freely
from my lips, as my love
calls to you
at that moment when we
are most vulnerable
and you comply
my tears falling between
hiccuped gasps and giggles
"I love you...always"
Author notes
The way I write is the way I think and feel within the moment. The feelings expressed in this poem defy metaphors in my mind because I can't find the words to describe what it's like so I simply told my story.
“L’amor che move il sole l’altre stele – love that moves the sun and the other stars”
- Dante.
In the intimate union between lovers the deepest sense of “intercourse” (physical intimacy) is carried by “outercourse” (emotional/spiritual intimacy) [Becker (2005]. Those who meet like this understands the language… (Marthinus Nijhoff).
A contest entry
- the language of intercourse and outercourse by Nicolette.
4500 points, ended June 1, 2008, 31 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
1 - 12 of 12
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Unlike my co-judge this poem is definitely NOT too soft for my tastes, Margaret. At least he did point out that the poem shows that you truly understand the essence of intercourse and outercourse and the relationship between the two!
I liked the soft romantic feel of this poem. It does indeed speak of true love in a soft and gentle way, but also captures the physical expression of love and desire very well. The line “that moment when we are most vulnerable” is so great as it is indeed through allowing ourselves to be vulnerable that we show and express love in all its forms. A lovely poem and a good take on the contest theme.
Thank you for this entry.
~ Nicolette
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the overall approach of this piece is a bit 'soft' for my personal tastes, but i think you captured and used the 'outercourse' theme very intuitively...which, of course, is the essence of outercourse.
i believe you are one of the few who truly understands it.
thanks for entering
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Passionate~~
Sensually sweet You have penned and how deep it touches to the core of one's being~
Beautifully done~
Love how Your Voice echoed based on the prompt
Thank You for sharing Your Heart and Spirit~
Many blessings to You in the contest Sweet Soul
Best wishes too
and much love~ Desire~*~
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Every word is just perfect mum...such great love filled descriptions
I really liked this-
fingertips aching with
the need to touch you
to memorize
I love that thought wanting to not only be with them but to memorize
Just wonderful, hope you do well in the contest
Love U Mum
Cin
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Thank you honey. I think if I edit any more I'll only ruin it.
Love you
Mum
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The improvements are awesome Mum, it couldnt be any better then this
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Oh Margaret, this is perhaps one of the best I've read from you yet dear. I predict that you will do well with this. *sigh*
Love and peace always,
mj.
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Thank you for your comment, Michael.
I hope I can live up to your expectations.
Always
Margaret
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Well said. Sometimes words are best left to simpleness
of just being in the moment. I really liked this.
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Thank you for your lovely comment. Believe me, I struggled to write in a more poetic manner but this is how I feel and these are the words that kept coming to mind.
Margaret
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A very nice piece, done very tastefully and wonderfully worded. i wish you all the best in the contest.
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Thank you Karl, I appreciate your comment and good wishes for the contest.
Love Margaret
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