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Falling Leaf

Gazing down, I catch him breathing at me,
I turn,
and I shy away,
bobbing on his breeze.

Clinging to my branch,
His pebbled cheeks, tanned and smooth,
remain in my veins,
and I allow myself
one more
glance.

Swooning,
I bob on the wind
of his gently up-turned tu-lips,
for his lightest kiss
is lead to my head,
and nectar to my heart.

His soft whispers,
bluster fear from my mind.
His laughter tickles the surface,
swirling inside,
gently curling,
yet unfurling
my modesty,

As I let myself fall
towards
the rippling beauty
that is
him.

A contest entry

Tell me what you feel.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 18 of 18
  • amazing imagery! i liked the "tu-lips" lol... my fav parts were when u swooned and fell (:
    great write and good luck


  • Ftw lol
    September 25, 2008
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    Wow its awesome i loved it. So sweet and Gentle *Swoons and falls* Offf. oh well i loves it

  • Poetryintheblood gold member
    August 15, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you for your beautiful dedication, good luck in my contest, Josie


  • BuriedTreasures silver member
    July 2, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Excellent composition with vivid imagery--
    Well Done and best of luck in the contest!


  • daviscth silver member
    July 2, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    How wonderful this is!!!! I'm not sure how many this will cool off but I liked it a lot and am glad you posted.


  • individuality gold member
    June 17, 2008

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    a good opening that has a sexual-sensual atmosphere to it which moves smoothly along the course as i read - i can see why you offered this in your comment on my wind inspired piece though you take your poem along our nature rather than nature's ways, though that is good. on another note, might i suggest those contests that have ended that you did not win anything, remove your poem from? keep the ones that show cups but flip the others out of the window lol


    • ladame
      June 17, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you very much for taking the time to read, and comment too - I really appreciate it.

      My poems are often inspired by, and run with sexual tension - it's a common theme in my life. Like I said, your poem has inspired something I'm going to work on tomorrow. I've done a word bank/mind map and structure with images I want to use, I just have to piece it together now. I think it'll be called "God's Mistress".

      I've removed them now, I just never get round to it, and I worry that some haven't ended, when in fact they have...ages ago.


      • individuality gold member
        June 17, 2008
        Edit | Reply
        i will look out for that title, please when you post it, if i forget send me the link.

        • ladame
          August 17, 2008
          Edit | Reply
          Hey, have you read my "God's Mistress" poem?

          I remember telling you about my inspiration from your poem...

          Sarah xx


  • whits end silver member
    June 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply

    Beautiful!

    This is a fantastic metaphorical piece!!
    Bravo, poet!

    • ladame
      June 12, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thank you for your lovely comment - it's nice to know when someone actually likes what you have written.


      Must read your work asap. Thank you again.


  • Hectic Michelle
    June 11, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    Thank you so much for this poem! It reminds me of myself! Well done poet!


  • Redrusty66
    June 9, 2008

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    Nice work, awesome imagery and free floating atmosphere allowing the reader a wide choice of personal perspective and interpretation. Great construction as well. Thanks for the great read


  • crazymomma
    June 7, 2008

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    I enjoyed the heartfelt emotion in this very much. The imagery was lovely as well. Thanks for entering and good luck in my contest


  • darlintlc silver member
    May 22, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Well done!

    "the rippling beauty
    that is
    him"

    wow!!
    thanks for entering
    darlintlc


  • meic
    May 20, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "bet Mike loved it" ... well this Mike did, anyway, even though it was not for me! "Autumn leaves never fall - they're pushed" [a quote from one of my poems] this is such a deliciously tender different approach to the subject. Most enjoyable. Mike


  • poppa
    May 19, 2008

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    Lovely dedication....this pours emotion, always the best poetry in my books....bet Mike loved it..


  • tehzeeb
    May 18, 2008
    Edit | Reply
    nice work!

1 - 18 of 18