Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

Dramatically Ever After






For months
you've lived in me:
breath-larcener,
pitching mind-tents
until I have

sacrificed all thought to you;

dread the terrible
sin of sleep.

Love, love,

the thump skips
along my collar
like the hand in head
that splits and
spills me; sits
in my stomach like
a third fist.

I am
too far gone
to be sapient:

trade morning coffee
for kissing hips
that crack against climate
and spasm your name;
crawl in your eyes
with a postcode

because British waters
were never hot enough
and I am tired
of fucking words

instead of you.









Author notes

Love hid in Illinois, but I found it.

In a list

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think.

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 11 of 11

  • ArtFullyMe gold member
    May 27

    Edit | Reply
    damn.... the 'visuals' in this are so crisp.. right 'there'

    I love

    love, love
    the thump skips

    etc

    maybe the whole thing,
    yes that's it..

    excellent....

    congratulations..


  • Rowan gold member
    May 27

    Edit | Reply
    How'd I miss this?! This is absolutely fantastic, and more than worthy of silver. The ending had me smilin...lol. Congratulations sweetie!!!


  • NurseChilly gold member
    May 21

    Edit | Reply
    oohh Allyce, tell me about it!! that bastard 'pond' is a little too big to jump, but believe me when i say, i'd try and swim it tomorrow or skim stones across it, to be with my man. as i see you would with yours ...

    life is surely bastard big and filled with bloody troubles too... i love love love this piece

    it speaks in my kind of language, well of course it does..

    LOLOL


    many thanks for entering this contest and good luck too

    G.x

  • the atlantic
    May 14

    Edit | Reply
    pitching mind-tents
    until I have
    sacrificed all thought to you;

    those lines were EPIC, such beautiful imagery. and the ending was like kick in the ass...so strong yet so relatable. lovely, lovely work al!

  • grm
    May 12

    Edit | Reply
    this is very well-written and seriously emotional.

    however, i think you shouldn't have beaten around the bush so much. lololol!


    watch out for those Illinoyze boyzz

    being one, i'd know


  • Nicolette gold member
    May 12

    Edit | Reply
    "breath-larcener" - oh yes, breath-takingly so!! I simply love this poem, Allyce - it's a wonderfully real, original and romantic expression of that big big love that is so taking your breath away!!

    "I am
    too far gone
    to be sapient"

    yes... when one is there one wants, needs, longs for more than fucking words....hmmmm a thought just jumped into my mind, but i'm sure you know what THAT is...

    You'll be close to him soon... you know what I told you to do, Allyce..go for it girl. And keep on writing love poetry like this. Beautiful!!



    ~ Nicolette


  • CaliOkie silver member
    May 11

    Edit | Reply
    Staggering. This is very impressive and I am not easily impressed. You see the world in a way I do not, but wish that I could. You write things that I would author if I could. Truly well done.

    Good luck in the contest.

    Garrison


  • Night Hope gold member
    May 11

    Edit | Reply
    "trade morning coffee
    for kissing hips
    that crack against climate
    and spasm your name;"

    Dammmnnn, you're good. Holy Ned. Good luck in the contest, Sweetie. I'd have to declare this love is HUGE. Wanda


  • dance for me
    May 11
    Edit | Reply
    This is good. Love the last lines.

1 - 11 of 11