Shug Macwathers

By the high-rise flats decaying,
'Neath the underpass of concrete
Stand the gang of Buckie drinkers
In their white and hooded tracksuits.
And the largest of the hoodies
With his belly filled with burgers,
And his face with spots erupting
He is known as Shug Macwathers.

Shug can drink a Buckie bottle,
In a single guzzling swallae
Then he smashes it to pieces
On the head of Wee Daft Jimmy.
Jimmy has a head of granite
Harder far than any concrete
And the shattered Buckie bottle
Disnae bother him a bittie.

Who would dare to pass these hoodies
Through this underpass at twilight?
Lit with flick'ring broken streetlamp
While the walls proclaim the message:
"Shug MacWathers rools this city,
Dinnae mess wi Shug and Jimmy!"
With his can of orange spray-paint
Shug writes up another message
Filled with hate and racial hatred:
"Deth to Poles and effing Pakis."

This the life of Shug Macwathers
This the life of many like him
Till the polis, heavy handed
Take him to the local borstal
Where he'll learn to burgle houses,
How to steal a Ford Mondeo,
How to hate the world with fervour!
What a fascinating future!