Dark eyes seeing what others can't
Blacker than the deepest waters
Skin bluer than the coldest touch
Shiny specs, like gills on her face
She has the power to see within
But even that couldn't stop her,
from feeling pain by her lover
Humans, deceitful and selfish creatures
Thus life
Author notes
Little Fish by `SeaFairy
A contest entry
- Picture Prompt #2 - Quickie by marlene47.
600 points, ended May 14, 2008, 11 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Pre-Write MadNess by Mango Memories.
400 points, ended July 26, 195 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Comments
1 - 16 of 16
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ohh...
i loveed the way u finished it off!
Just stunning
well done on a great write!
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Yup!
Yup, cool write! I like it! Impressed by the number of trophies you have on your page, btw. In this one, I like all the sense related descriptions of colour, touch, temperature. The "gills on her face" similie is very effective for me as well.
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SO TRUE I UNDERSTAND EVERYTHING U WRITEN! VERRY GOOD!
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wow...
humans are probable the most selfish animal to ever walk the earth... but there are the few that truely want to help others... and these are the "freaks"... thanks for sharing
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Interesting take on the prompt, yet with all her power to see within, she's broken hearted by a human. Thank you for your entry.
Marlene -
People are jerks. And the way you said she has the power to see within, it's like she has powers. Very nice
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awww =( so sad
very emotional
i rlly like it
i was gonna do this contest!
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Ooh.. hun you did a great job!
you really captured the picture..
And the ending really brought it home!
great write!
Best of luck hun!
Angel
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WOW its all i can say. good job u made me speechless
(n thts hard to do) lmao -
i really liek the ending, its very strong. and the rest has a nice and deep feel to it, nice job and good luck with the contest
take care -
this is beautiful. i love your take on the prompt and good luck in the contest
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Love this one & relates to life so well. Just brilliant =) gd luck in the contest!
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i like your take on the picture. good luck in the contest!
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wow very vivid. i love the line *shiny specs, like gills on her face* that is amazing.
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Nice! A great take on the prompt. My fav lines were 3-6. Such depth. I wish you luck in the contest!
~Kystal Angel
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This is beautiful!!!! I love the line humans, deceitful and selfish creatures. Its so true we realy are.
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