My nerves are strung to breaking
Can this really happen?
Is this really happening to me?
I don’t see how
This doesn’t happen to people like me
What exactly did you do?
Am I still innocent?
Am I even still alive?
What have you done to me?
I hate you…I think…
I cannot get my thoughts straight
It’s too cold
Is that the snow? Or is it my soul?
Too close to know the difference
I can feel your hands
Are those your hands?
Why are they on me?
Get them off me!
I’m scared now
I don’t want to be here anymore
Kevin…Marie…Dana?
Anyone there?
Can one of you guys help me?
Your breath smells like mint
I can smell you
But my senses are confused
Because I’m feeling you, not smelling…
And yet…and yet…
Stop it!
Stop doing that to me!
I want to go home
It’s too cold
Am I outside? Where am I?
Who are you?
I can feel you on me
Please, get off me
I don’t know who you are
I can’t think of who I am
I don’t know what’s happening to me
But, please, stop…
That hurts…I never knew it could hurt
You’re hurting me
Are you sure that no one is there?
Is anyone there?
I can’t hear myself think
But I can hear you
I can feel you…
Please…
Stop…
Don’t do this…
Who are you…?
Author notes
CALLING ALL TEENAGERS - Options 1 and 2. This is when I was raped at a party. It's a mixture of loss of innocence and being trapt because I was passed out, and I couldn't fight back...my thoughts were scattered, kinda like when you are dreaming but on the verge of waking up. I knew it was happening, but I could do nothing to fully wake up. I felt trapt inside myself.
I am 17 years old.
Make me Cry - Option Number 3. It's a little over 50 lines, but I already shortened it as much as I could, and I was hoping that since the lines were pretty short and simple, it would be ok? Let me know if it's not and I'll see what I can do to knock out a stanza or two.
A contest entry
- CALLING ALL TEENAGERS...... by InfiniteCaitlin.
800 points, ended June 9, 2008, 23 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Only One Winner by crazymomma.
300 points, ended May 16, 2008, 12 entries
Honorable mention
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest - Make me cry....options =] and PW allowed :D by LeilaJayne.
900 points, ended May 17, 2008, 33 entries
• next poem in this contest, remove from contest
Please tell me what you think
Comments
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So sorry this happened to you. It is good that you can write about it and express yourself. I hope you know that even though you were passed out it wasn't your fault. I asked for emotion and you gave it.
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I like this piece. It has great emotion. but it seems a little scattered. I think you should work on u, more images and using a more passionate vocabulary. You repeat some words quite a bit. So try to fix that. but over all I like the intent to this piece.
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I did my best to reconstruct my actual thoughts that night. Being passed out and in a "dreamlike" state, that's why my thoughts were scattered and repetitive. Cause you know like in your mind when you don't understand something, you tend to repeat it several times to help it become more clear.
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this made me cry
this is so powerful and at the same time conveys a weak and helpless person being preyed upon... a perfect mix of the present strength and the past victimization. i just entered this contest as well and I usually make it a point to read the other entries to see what I'm up against, and you have truly struck a chord in my heart... I wish you the best of luck.
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