Ditch the ads, upload images and much more - upgrade today from 5.95/month!
Read • Contests • Groups • Learn • Forums • Store • Help
 

The last headache


Shivering handshakes
blush in pale pink
..that rosy little dress
mother presented her dying daughter.

She reminds every soul to question
alcoholic outbursts
driven by old songs played
in the broken green sedan.

Did'nt you hear?

She threw her spirit to numb
in skygazers pattern
like rough villians
decided that mutiny of peace
should be awarded for last solace.

Still,she lies in muslin silk
a dampened sentiment
being showed off in stains
and severe remains of hunger.

Everyday she solemnly promises
to handle goodness
in Hitlers passion.
  Every starving energy
  mutiliates its womb
  ravaging from one thread
  to enter the hole of the needle
  without ashened hands.


The last brandished whiskey
trickles unfaithfully
  ~cavaderous~
she consolidates mind sets
in severe abandonments.

As she walks to church
she indulges herself
into faith
  that all headaches
    which come
    will go away
      ......someday.








Author notes

"Her headaches are constant, increasing in pain each passing day. She cant even manage to stand on her own its gotten so bad" Flyleaf - Supernatural.

A contest entry

Please tell me what you think

    : , Your review:

    Comment Suggestion: What is your your first impression?
    • Line numbers  • Invite them to read
    : no Cost: 0 free left 0 points, You have (?)

Comments

1 - 21 of 21

  • lyricist
    January 31

    Edit | Reply
    i have headaches everyday, eliminate them out of my life and still wake up with them. i like the fourth stanza or paragraph. this a true piece


  • trekkergirl
    January 31

    Edit | Reply
    I can relate to this one some what... you see I have suffered from headaches all my life. They are not fun and do affect everything you do in life... when you don't feel good... you don't want to do the fun things let alone the things that need to be done... good write.


  • couldbeworse
    January 30

    Edit | Reply
    She reminds every soul to question
    alcoholic outbursts
    driven by old songs played
    in the broken green sedan.

    so sad but really good piece.


  • morgana raven Greeters member
    January 29

    Edit | Reply
    I'm currently suffering a headache right now, i have been on a game all day and forgot to check the list I came on and there were loads of new ones up =( Another well penned write here, fantastic words as always.
    Laura


  • untouched pages
    January 29

    Edit | Reply
    This write has alot of meaning for me. I suffer from Headakes and Migraines almost daily. I know what it's like to have some of these feelings. the last stanza really touched me!!

    ""As she walks to church
    she indulges herself
    into faith
    that all headaches
    which come
    will go away
    ......someday.""

    You never know when they will go, or when they will come back and you don't want to always be popping pills..Anyways enough of my blabber.. thank you for penning this!!

    ~*Cristy*~


  • DancingQueenAngi
    June 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    Wow! I really liked your write, but I wish you would give us a little more as to what really causes the headaches.
    ~Angi


  • LeilaJayne
    June 1, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    'Did'nt you hear?'
    ...the apostrophe is in the wrong place of Didn't

    Apart from that this is good. Thanks for entering x


  • ml12
    May 10, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    The final stanza is brilliant in word choice and the thoughts and images the spawn in my mind with a hopeful release. Perhaps the apostrophe in the ninth line should be corrected. Good luck in the contest

    • phoenixonfire
      May 21, 2008
      Edit | Reply
      Thanks for the comment and for pointing out the mistake! I ll look into it
      pri

  • Judith Chandler
    May 9, 2008

    Edit | Reply
    "indulges herself into faith" I like that word choice and the series of images are so vivid.

    Good luck with it.

1 - 21 of 21