you make excuses
and i wonder what you are-
what you were,
who you can be,
your so easy.
so right in your own mind,
so true.
do you understand
your telling the truth?
telling your truths-
spilling your guts
in open heart surgery-
the'll open your mind,
kill your time
i want to make an angel
out of a junkie,
give life to the
walking dead,
to the hopeless
and intoxicated,
to the brain crazy,
to god and its many concepts,
to empty bottles,
to trash,
to human trash,
and the faith-less wonders.
whatever you feel is false
and whatever you see is
twice that because,
WERE LIVING IN A WORLD
OF LIERS AND FOOLS
AND EVERYONE MUST
CHOOSE SIDES.
well ... i dont like it.
Comments
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Why don't you like it, seriously?
I think it throws a lot of stuff out there to think about and the ending does, especially.
Everyone must choose sides...
But holy hell can I relate to this. My mind is set to think a lot of things based on society... Everything that happens, little, big, or small has an effect on everything and anything, including my thoughts ~ and everyone elses too. So, yeah, you get the point.
I see truth in this. And basically, it's an amazing poem.
"i want to make an angel
out of a junkie,
give life to the
walking dead,
to the hopeless
and intoxicated,
to the brain crazy,
to god and its many concepts,
to empty bottles,
to trash,
to human trash,
and the faith-less wonders."
Really, anything is possible and I guess you could make a junkie turn into an angel. A lot of things that seem insanely crazy can happen, just as that could. "to god and its many concepts" ~ that part grabs me. You have a great 8th stanza.
Everyone thinks differently and all interpret things differently as well.
So many people can read this and see so many sides of it. I know I can.
You tied it off with a freakin' awesome last stanza. The caps lettering I usually don't like just 'cause I'm weird like that, but it actually made sense to do that in this one. You got your points through.
This is my fav from you so far.
Sincerely,
dovey ~


-
Ah, I'm not hugely keen - I see no need for the drama of the ending because the lines "whatever you feel is false
and whatever you see is
twice that" are beautiful.
You have some grammar problems, which I would be keen to sort out
-
I like it.
:]
It's very... deep.
-
wow
this is kinda dark and deep its really good. i like the line about making an angel out of a junkie that was an awsome line. good job with this - brook




